Daily Notes, Featuring All the Teams Without Hope

Table of Contents
Here’s the table of contents for today’s edition of Daily Notes.

1. All the Teams Without Hope
2. Other Notable Games (Including MLB.TV Free Game)
3. Today’s Complete Schedule

All the Teams Without Hope
Woody Allen on Hope
Here’s a brief passage from Woody Allen’s book Without Feathers regarding hope:

How wrong Emily Dickinson was! Hope is not “the thing with feathers.” The thing with feathers has turned out to be my nephew. I must take him to a specialist in Zurich.

Norm MacDonald on Hope
Here’s an excerpt from Norm MacDonald’s special Me Doing Standup, in which he discusses hope briefly — like around the 5:40 mark, mostly. (Note: this clip contains English swear words.)

Table: All the Teams Without Hope
Here are all teams without any more hope in 2012 (where hope is defined as “having at least a five percent chance of making the playoffs per Cool Standings on Wednesday night when the author made this table”):

Team W L Playoff%
Chicago NL 46 70 0.0
Houston 39 80 0.0
Colorado 44 71 0.0
Minnesota 50 67 <0.1
Philadelphia 54 63 <0.1
Miami 53 65 <0.1
San Diego 52 67 <0.1
Cleveland 54 63 0.1
Milwaukee 52 64 0.1
Kansas City 51 65 0.2
New York NL 55 62 0.2
Toronto 55 62 1.1
Seattle 55 64 1.3

Other Notable Games
Los Angeles NL at Pittsburgh | 16:05 ET
The Pirates, right now, are on what scientists refer to in their science labs all the time as the “precipice” of playoff contention.

Readers’ Preferred Broadcast: Pittsburgh Radio, Sort Of.

Chicago AL at Toronto | 19:07 ET ***MLB.TV Free Game***
Top Prospect Anthony Gose Status Update, Sponsored by the Ontario Ministry of Tourism (“It’s all here in Ontario!”): 72 PA, .188/.257/.234 (.324 BABIP), 40 wRC+, -0.3 WAR.

Readers’ Preferred Broadcast: Toronto Radio.

Oakland at Kansas City | 20:10 ET
Right-hander Dan Straily, who is made from shimmering and organic crystal, makes his third major-league start. Here’s his line so far: 10.2 IP, 21.3% K, 4.3% BB, 20.6% GB, 4.10 SIERA, 106 xFIP-, -0.2 WAR.

Readers’ Preferred Broadcast: Oakland Radio.

Today’s Complete Schedule
Here’s the complete schedule for all of today’s games, with our very proprietary watchability (NERD) scores for each one. Pitching probables and game times aggregated from MLB.com and RotoWire. The average NERD Game Score for today is 5.3.

Note: the following Game Scores include the poorly conceived playoff-odds adjustment discussed in a recent edition of Daily Notes. Also note: the following table is entirely sortable.

Away   SP Tm. Gm. Tm. SP   Home Time
Derek Holland TEX 6 7 5 7 8 NYA Ivan Nova 13:05
Joe Blanton LAN 8 1 8 5 7 PIT A.J. Burnett 16:05
Clay Buchholz BOS 4 6 4 1 5 BAL Chris Tillman 19:05
Francis. Liriano CHA 7 4 3 6 2 TOR Aaron Laffey 19:07
Matt Harvey NYN 9 2 4 4 6 CIN Homer Bailey 19:10
Jason Marquis SD 5 6 5 7 8 ATL Kris Medlen* 19:10
Dan Straily* OAK 10 6 7 8 5 KC Luke Hochevar 20:10
Cliff Lee PHI 9 5 6 7 8 MIL Marco Estrada 20:10
Trevor Cahill AZ 5 7 5 9 4 STL Kyle Lohse 20:15
Ricky Nolasco MIA 4 2 3 8 5 COL Alex White 20:40
David Price TB 10 4 8 8 5 LAA Dan Haren 22:05

To learn more about Pitcher and Team NERD scores click here.
To learn how Game NERD Scores are calculated, click here.
* = Fewer than 20 IP, NERD at discretion of very handsome author.

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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

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Dr. Internet
Dr. Internet
4 years 1 month ago

You’re stats are off, corncob.

Brazen Reader
4 years 1 month ago

Not just the stats.

4 years 1 month ago

Francis Liriano sounds better then Francisco Liriano. I propose with abbreviate that always.

Well-Beered Englishman
Well-Beered Englishman
4 years 1 month ago

“A place to stand, a place to grow, Ontariariario”, the unofficial Ontario theme song:

This was sung to me by a Blue Jays fan at spring training. If he’s reading this, thank you, good sir.