NotGraphs Baseball

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  1. My team name last year in all three of my fantasy baseball leagues was “Chasing Utley”, a play on Chase Utley’s name and on the Kevin Smith movie “Chasing Amy”.

    Comment by CrashburnAlley — January 26, 2011 @ 10:31 am

  2. This isn’t the wittiest of choices, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to go with “Angels Acquire Vernon Wells”. It will make my league laugh every time they see it.

    Comment by BringVottoHome — January 26, 2011 @ 10:32 am

  3. Is “The Itchy Pujols” already over-played?

    Comment by MTUCache — January 26, 2011 @ 10:32 am

  4. Otherwise I’m going to be stuck using “ARod’s Purse” again…

    Comment by MTUCache — January 26, 2011 @ 10:32 am

  5. For the last 3 or 4 years I have used “Sell My Grill Manny”

    Manny is one of modern day baseballs greatest characters. Any guy who is willing to take a picture next to his neighbor’s grill, say that it is his and include a signed baseball to help increase the selling price of the grill is worthy of fantasy baseball team named after him in my book.

    Comment by T-pain — January 26, 2011 @ 10:39 am

  6. I had stolen one for a few years that i won’t Release here because I didn’t come up with it, but I’ll be changing to ‘Fisk Me’ for the new year

    Comment by Destroia — January 26, 2011 @ 10:46 am

  7. For years, I’ve gone with “The Rio Granderson”

    Comment by gerardnmartin — January 26, 2011 @ 10:48 am

  8. Our league had movie/baseball names last year, based on players on our team. Some of the better ones: Inglorious Bastardos, The Dark Wright, The Braun Supremacy, The Hangoverbay, Shaun of the Dead, and Joakim Tall

    Comment by Jon Colosimo — January 26, 2011 @ 10:50 am

  9. I’m going with my old blog name this year: “Basement Dwellers.” Not only represents my likely position in the standings, but also a reference to the fact that all I do is sit in my basement and look at spreadsheets even though “I need to get outside and watch a damn game for once.”
    -j

    Comment by jinaz — January 26, 2011 @ 10:50 am

  10. Ever since I read Ball Four, I’ve used the name Beaver Shooters in at least one league a year.

    Comment by Greg — January 26, 2011 @ 10:51 am

  11. “…and a player to be named Latos”

    Comment by Russ — January 26, 2011 @ 10:51 am

  12. I’ve always been a fan of the San Jose Cansecos.

    Comment by Mike — January 26, 2011 @ 10:53 am

  13. I always liked Winnie the Pujols

    Comment by kenny — January 26, 2011 @ 10:58 am

  14. Heyward Jablowme
    Bay-te Rape
    The Z’s Knees
    Cum in your Jair
    Contreras to Popular Belief

    Have others, will post after meeting.

    Comment by Rangerfloppy — January 26, 2011 @ 10:58 am

  15. my 2 last year was Snooki’s n Cream and PAPelbon Smears

    this was for football, but one of our friends has Skittles taste Dewayne Bowe.

    Comment by David W — January 26, 2011 @ 10:59 am

  16. Musically Inspired:

    A-Rod Lives Underwater
    Counting Cromarties
    Thomy! Thomi! Thome!
    Jon Jay Supremes
    The Howie Kendrick Experience
    Roll Over Ty Colvin
    Little Pink Howsers
    Sex & Candelaria
    Captain & Emil
    Kirby Puckett and the Mistress Slap

    Comment by 3rdPeriodPoints — January 26, 2011 @ 11:05 am

  17. Smell the Glove. Spinal Tap and baseball reference.

    Comment by odbsol — January 26, 2011 @ 11:10 am

  18. The Oneders (or spell it The O’Needers if they don’t get the movie reference). I go with this often.

    I’ve won a few leagues with Jeters Never Prosper, so I still dust it off from time to time even though it feels campy now.

    Comment by Nick — January 26, 2011 @ 11:52 am

  19. As a suffering Chad Qualls owner for much of last year, I adopted Chad LOLZ for the second half of the season.

    Comment by Connor — January 26, 2011 @ 12:04 pm

  20. Last year I had Owners of a Loney Hart and Only the Loney. This year one of my teams names is With or without Youk

    Comment by Damon — January 26, 2011 @ 12:27 pm

  21. One of my best was just plain “Doug Fister” but it’s a little dirty.

    Liked “Always Wear Clean Hunter Pence”

    Tried “The Other Other Escobar” one time, didn’t work so well

    “Billy Beane is not My Lover” was pretty good.

    Just saw this one: “My Pujols Byrnes.” wow.

    Comment by Eno Sarris — January 26, 2011 @ 12:46 pm

  22. My favorite from last year, though no longer as timely: Longorias Basterds

    Comment by Mark — January 26, 2011 @ 12:49 pm

  23. Off-topic kind of:

    I used to joke that Brodie Croyle’s passes landed “somewhere over Dwayne Bowe.”

    Comment by Dan — January 26, 2011 @ 12:54 pm

  24. The Fat Bastardos

    Comment by Steve — January 26, 2011 @ 1:25 pm

  25. I went in with “Dunn with Punns” but when I didn’t end up drafting him I switched it to “(Dave) Bush (Brandon) League”

    Comment by Sam — January 26, 2011 @ 1:28 pm

  26. I know it’s hockey, but it’s still a good one:
    Don’t Toews Me Bro

    Some good baseball ones I’ve used:
    Morneau For Pyros
    Bourn Supremacy
    The Butler Did It

    Comment by Rob — January 26, 2011 @ 1:39 pm

  27. From my friend Scott: “It Byrnes when I Peavy”

    Comment by Travis Reitsma — January 26, 2011 @ 2:38 pm

  28. Being a huge Sim City fan as a kid, and a FPS gamer as a teen helped develop a love of llamas, so I often use Llamaville Sluggers and Alaskan Alpacas.

    Comment by Chris — January 26, 2011 @ 3:11 pm

  29. Haren my Pujols

    Comment by lftyg33 — January 26, 2011 @ 3:15 pm

  30. DeJesus of Alameda

    Former Modesto Nuts

    Bum Gardeners

    Cody Ross: Dress for Less

    Bip Roberts

    Manny Ramirez Push Up Bra

    Jeter’s Sloppy Seconds

    Miguel Cairo Projections

    Chone’s Projections

    Farnsw0rthl3ss

    Ian Desmond Jennings

    Tim Spooneybarger’s Comeback

    Jose Bautista Canseco

    Mike Minor in Possession

    Stubbs’ Amputees

    Johnny Gomes not Gomez

    Jesus of MOntero

    Comment by SAmmy — January 26, 2011 @ 3:46 pm

  31. Byrnes when I Peavy

    Comment by asdf — January 26, 2011 @ 5:07 pm

  32. A bunch…sorry if I repeat any

    What Can Braun Do For You?
    Lowe Blowe
    Smoak On The Water
    Take It In The Buchholz
    Holliday Hawks
    Pence-Off Dance-Off
    Rolen On The River

    My friend has come up with some awful ones…

    The Dancing Saitos
    Cuddyer Haren Eyebrows

    The worst one ever:

    Youk Kent Doumit!

    Comment by CaliforniaJag — January 26, 2011 @ 6:08 pm

  33. for this year, I’m going with Yellow Beard Dipping Idiots, which is what Oney Guilley called Bobby Jenks. (It beats out Swell-Headed Bushers, which is what HomeRun Baker called Fred Snodgrass after spiking him twice in one 1911 world series game).

    Comment by jordan — January 26, 2011 @ 8:46 pm

  34. Tulowit to Quit

    Comment by Matt — January 26, 2011 @ 9:36 pm

  35. SlobOnMyKnoblauch

    Comment by Watson — January 27, 2011 @ 12:11 am

  36. From the annals:

    Garvey’s Kids

    Margo’s Men

    Niekrophiliacs (My fave)

    Comment by JRM — January 27, 2011 @ 7:01 am

  37. Who Farted? Jorge FabreGAS

    Comment by Chad Bro Chill 87 — January 27, 2011 @ 1:32 pm

  38. A couple good ones in my league:

    Ellsbury Doughboys
    HanRam Thank You Ma’am
    The Braun Supremacy

    Comment by The X Factor — January 28, 2011 @ 10:48 am

  39. continuing w/ the player puns theme:
    The Knights Who Say Niese
    A Pocket Full of Posey
    Ned’s Atomic Maybin (yeah obscure 90s band reference)

    Comment by Jon J. — January 28, 2011 @ 11:50 am

  40. “Morneau For Pyros”

    winner

    Comment by Greg — January 28, 2011 @ 3:41 pm

  41. As a Cubs fans (I’m sorry too) last season I came up with:

    Prom Night Dempster Babies
    50 cent Wells
    My Pujols is Soriano
    A Byrd Sh*t On My Car

    and this year I’m thinking:
    Pena Way Too Much

    Comment by Matt — February 18, 2011 @ 12:12 pm

  42. The Pujols moLesters

    Comment by G — February 27, 2011 @ 12:44 am

  43. I’ve been using this the last couple seasons.

    Inglorius Batsters

    Comment by Jeff — February 27, 2011 @ 11:40 am

  44. Cabreras’ bartender

    Comment by big red — March 14, 2011 @ 6:04 pm

  45. Monostat 007… mine for years. Love it. I hate references to players names in the team name.

    Comment by Jayrrock — March 17, 2011 @ 11:32 pm

  46. My Balls Ichiro

    Comment by CUASH — March 22, 2011 @ 5:03 pm

  47. If you have Nich Swisher:

    The Swisher Sweets

    Comment by Jimmy — March 23, 2011 @ 12:15 am

  48. Aybar 1 To Manny,Miggys my team name.. Also was going to go with A-RodInMikeCameronDiaz

    Comment by Joshua NYC — March 25, 2011 @ 12:23 pm

  49. The two I’m using this year:
    Magical Warlocks
    “No, ‘magical warlock’ is not redundant, THAT’S JUST HOW MAGICAL HE IS. Do the math.” -Charlie Sheen

    Gnarly Gnarlingtons
    “What they’re not ready for is guys like you and I and Nails and all the other gnarly gnarlingtons in my life, that we are high priests, Vatican assassin warlocks. Boom. Print that, people. See where that goes.” -Charlie Sheen

    Thanks Chuck.

    Comment by Sigepflynner — March 26, 2011 @ 10:16 pm

  50. I Shot Teixeira

    Comment by Boriente — June 11, 2011 @ 9:05 pm

  51. Teahan Crumpets

    Comment by Boriente — June 11, 2011 @ 9:17 pm

  52. I got a couple that weren’t mentioned…

    Zack & Miri Make A Morneau

    Votto-Erotic Asphyxiations

    That last one is a tribute to the late David Carradine

    Comment by Dan Capri — June 22, 2011 @ 7:06 am

  53. Ol Dirty Bastardos
    Poor Dumb Bastardos
    OMG, They Killed Kenny. You BASTARDOS!!!

    Comment by KC — July 6, 2011 @ 6:29 pm

  54. I think the best fantasy baseball team that i thought for myself is Smoak Some Dope

    Comment by Billy B — July 21, 2011 @ 10:35 pm

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    Comment by Blog focus on Entrepreneur — November 12, 2011 @ 5:56 pm

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    Comment by penawar buasir — November 13, 2011 @ 3:19 am

  57. I named mine Buster nut in her Posey

    Comment by Tyler — February 17, 2012 @ 12:33 pm

  58. I might be slow, but I don’t get it? Morneau For Pyros? Am I just saying it too slowly or something?

    Comment by AJ — March 17, 2012 @ 12:13 am

  59. A play on Perry Ferrell’s solo band… Porno For Pyros.

    Prono = Morneau

    Comment by Steve — March 20, 2012 @ 8:42 pm

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