A Brief and Fictional Account of Meeting Bob Uecker

I was trying to listen to the game, but turned to the station and heard only silence. “Must be a rain delay,” I told my wife, except — and, please note, this is where events skew decidedly fantastic — except it wasn’t my wife in the next room, but radio voice of baseball’s Milwaukee Brewers, Bob Uecker, instead.

“This is clearly absurd,” I said. “You’re supposed to be in Milwaukee, not in my affordable apartment in Madison.” To which sentiment he responded: “Supposed to? I’m 77 years old, man. My only obligation now is to greet the abyss with something not unlike dignity.”

That was a great moment between us — probably one of my top-five as an adult so far, were I to make a list.


In conclusion:

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Carson Cistulli occasionally publishes spirited ejaculations at The New Enthusiast.

3 Responses to “A Brief and Fictional Account of Meeting Bob Uecker”

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  1. Desk says:

    What are the other 4? Do they all involve your hatred of America, what America stands for and the American Dream(tm)?

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    • Jack says:

      Just some random guesses:
      Being Born
      Watching the Astros do something distinctly Astros this season
      Drafting Charlie Blackmon in the 2012 NotGraphs fantasy league
      After being depressed about missing a Home Improvement marathon the previous weekend, discovering that there would be another one the next weekend, and this one would be the entire third season.

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  2. Sir Smooth says:

    I feel like you make your best point in the conclusion.

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