In a series of posts yesterday, some longer than others, Davids Appleman and Cameron introduced new stats, exclusive to FanGraphs, that help us to evaluate pitcher success. The discerning baseball fan will find these indispensable going forward — or at least they will find them to be an excuse to sit at a computer, staring at custom leaderboards for dozens of additional hours while their social lives and muscles atrophy.
Indeed, FanGraphs has become known for its insightful analysis and groundbreaking statistical endeavors. NotGraphs, on the other hand, if it has become known, has become known for…not those things.
But that is not to say that we NotGraphers are oblivious to the standards of excellence established by our parent site. That is why, in hasty, scrambling reaction to these exciting developments at FanGraphs, we at NotGraphs are announcing several new “stats” of our own, and even several new Investigative Reporting Investigation Teams. What follows are names and brief descriptions of said, on which we have no intention of following up.
Weighted Tweets Created Per News Cycle — wTC/NC
Baseball writers probably feel more and more pressure than ever to crank out tweets, especially during the peak hours. Being active keeps them in the minds of their Twitter followers, keeps their employers happy, etc.
This applies to players, too: some players are more popular than their stats might suggest because they maintain colorfully written and/or frequently updated Twitter feeds — Logan Morrison, for example.
But, all Tweets are not created equal, friends. When Kevin Goldstein tweets about a band or Peter Gammons has one of his accidental pocket tweets, it’s not as valuable or entertaining (well, the Gammons pocket tweets are pretty good) to fans as when players tweet pics from inside the locker room or from their personal lives (enquiring minds want to know!), or when writers thoughtfully answer questions directed @ them. Also, tweets during peak Twitter traffic hours will reach more followers than those at non-peak hours.
Our wTC/NC stat will adjust a Twitterer’s body of tweets for the hour they were tweeted, their cogency, and the degree to which they are baseball-related and fan-oriented. All of these elements will have their own values that can be viewed in the Tweet Value Leaderboard. Said leaderboard will also include Snark Factor, which doesn’t figure in to wTC/NC, but gives additional context for the quality of the tweets. Eventually, we’ll adjust for region and, in the case of players, team atmosphere.
Hair Independent Style Points — HISP
Subconsciously, I think, we attribute most of a player’s style clout to hair and facial hair. (Navin Vaswani pointed out how Colby Rasmus might have lost some points recently.) Usually, hair is immediately noticeable (even with hats and helmets!), so that makes sense. Like, in Milwaukee it was a very big deal when John Axford cut his hair and moustache. When we think of Coco Crisp, we think of the afro; Luke Scott, his ridiculous porkchops.
This new NotGraphs metric measures player style independently of hair and facial hair. What it does consider: sock height/color, homerun trot, dugout idiosyncrasies (think Adrian Beltre), photos in street clothes, interviews, Twitter accounts, and shenanigans.
How are we compiling all this info? Well, I’m glad you asked…
NotGraphs Investigative Reporting Investigation Team: Style Squad
A new committee has been formed to gather and sort data for players. The esteemed members of this committee are net-trollers with a sartorial eye, mostly, who cripple their fingers tunneling through the intertrodes, gathering data to throw into the magical NotGraphs StatMaker Deluxe 2.0™, which we use to produce the stats mentioned above. Having a sartorial eye does not mean abiding by good fashion oneself.
NotGraphs Investigative Reporting Investigation Team: Self-Investigatory Committee
Times are, you can’t trust anyone, not even yourself. That’s why we’ve created this committee, comprised of ourselves, to look at all the work that we’ve done and to make sure it’s as specious as possible. If it’s not laden with lapidary twists and devoid of any newsworthy content, it’s NotFit for NotGraphs. Amirite?