Albert Lyu and Carson Cistulli are overzealously reviewing colleague Jonah Keri’s forthcoming book, The Extra 2%. Feel free to read parts one, two, three, four, and five of what critics are definitely not calling “late for dinner.”
In what follows, our handsome gentlemen discuss the takeover by Stuart Sternberg and Friends of the Rays — and like 10 other things Carson doesn’t understand.
Cistulli: Chapter five — as you’ll know by now, Albert — concerns the takeover by Stuart Sternberg of the Rays in 2005 and two of his earliest hires: Team President Matt Silverman and Executive Vice President of Baseball Operations (a.k.a. Mega GM) Andrew Friedman. The unique thing about this triumvirate is that the bulk of their pre-Ray experience came not in baseball operations, but in the financial sector — and, specifically, investment banking.
I’m not lying, Albert, when I tell you that a number of my high school classmates are involved in this line of work; nor’m I misleading you even for a second when I suggest that my understanding of i-banking and its attendant culture is limited by a combo package of willful and totally unintentional ignorance.
Really, Albert, my knowledge of professions is limited by a single criterion — namely, if there’s a Lego character for it or not. Farmer? Teacher? Fireman? Io frigging capisco. Consultant? I-Banker? Charlie Sheen?* No so much.
*Note: Relevant pop-culture humor!
Albert: I thought Charlie Sheen wasn’t an actual job anymore. So you’re off the hook, Carson, if you have no idea what a Charlie Sheen does in a typical day of work. As far as Twitter pics can tell me, at the least.