Ballplayers Whose Names Are Also Danish Ejaculations

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Anyone whose family, or who he himself, purchased an Apple-brand computer anytime before, say, 1995 will likely have more than a passing knowledge of the genre commonly known as edutainment, a very specific sort of software program that, in striving to provide users with content that is both educational and entertaining, typically provides neither.

That fact having being established, allow the author to announce that, in every relevant way — both in that it is neither very educational nor very entertaining — the present post is a goddamn exemplar of the edutainment genre.

What follows is a collection of five baseball players (most past, one present) whose names most resemble popular Danish ejaculations — at least so far Wiktionary has led the author to believe.

Readers can use this post to both not learn Danish and also learn very little about baseball!

Player: Willie Horton (Profile)
Who He Was: Mostly Tigers outfielder, 1963-1980
Relevant Danish Ejaculation: Hørt! (Real Dictionary Entry)
Meaning: Hear, hear!

Player: Denny Lortscher (Profile)
Who He Was: Minor-league pitcher, 1963-1969
Relevant Danish Ejaculation: Lort! (Real Dictionary Entry)
Meaning: Crap! Shit!

Player: Laynce Nix (Profile)
Who He Is: Major-league outfielder since 2003
Relevant Danish Ejaculation: Nix! (Real Dictionary Entry)
Meaning: No! No way!

Player: Shet Pojda (Profile)
Who He Was: Indy league player in Providence, 1948
Relevant Danish Ejaculation: Pøj! (Real Dictionary Entry)
Meaning: Yuck!

Player: Joe Skalski (Profile)
Who He Was: Mostly minor-league pitcher, 1986-1990
Relevant Danish Ejaculation: Skål! (Real Dictionary Entry)
Meaning: Cheers!




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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.


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dbake005
Member
dbake005
3 years 4 months ago

Hall of fame title.

filihok
Guest
3 years 4 months ago

Det gor bra

Danny Knobgobbler
Guest
Danny Knobgobbler
3 years 4 months ago

brun printshop

Jason Nix
Guest
Jason Nix
3 years 4 months ago

What about Lance Nix’s brother Jason Nix?

sloppy.

Jay29
Member
Jay29
3 years 4 months ago

Knyw whyt’s slyppy? Lyvyng thy ‘y’s oyt yf thy Nix brythyrs’ fyrst nymys.

Anonymous Bosch
Guest
Anonymous Bosch
3 years 4 months ago

Jan Svensson Spreading the Water of Life into an Alpenhorn

canuckassassin
Member
canuckassassin
3 years 4 months ago

This entry is a proverbial Danish Bukkake

pickle cars
Guest
pickle cars
3 years 4 months ago

Are the Danes fanatics of bukkake the way some other cultures seem to be?

Evan
Guest
Evan
3 years 4 months ago

I thought this post was going to involve pastry.

St. Pierre
Guest
St. Pierre
3 years 4 months ago

Well played, Evan.

Dauber
Guest
Dauber
3 years 4 months ago

Expected former Sox pitcher Gar Finnvold to be mentioned. I have actually yelled his name in anger. And on Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Both were satisfying.

TKDC
Guest
TKDC
3 years 4 months ago

Not what I expected from a joke about Shet Pojda’s name.

Fernando Tatis
Guest
Fernando Tatis
3 years 4 months ago

Relevant Finnish ejaculation: Tattis
Meaning: Thanks!

Wally Pipp
Guest
Wally Pipp
3 years 4 months ago

Relevant Faroese ejaculation: Pipp
Meaning: Tweet!

Aubrey Huff
Guest
Aubrey Huff
3 years 4 months ago

Relevant Norwegian ejaculation: Huff!
Meaning: expression of minor revulsion, minor horror

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