Best Marco Scutaro Tweets (From Fans of His Former Teams and/or Phil Collins)

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Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.


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dragonflyball
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dragonflyball
3 years 7 months ago

The Red Sox are pathologically incapable of retaining any shortstop that I like. I wasn’t even all that enamored of Scutaro, other than that he has a nickname that ends with a T, and for some reason I like those, but my love for Alex Gonzalez is pure and true, O-Cab was better than Renteria in 2005 and better than Lugo in 2007-2009, and the only thing I am displeased with about the acquisition of John Farrell is that they had to give up Mike Aviles, Hypnotist of Ladies, in order to get him.

MikeS
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MikeS
3 years 7 months ago

I get it, but it is still tiresome. In honor of the seventh anniversary of a light hitting left fielder hitting a walk off WS home run, I present Scotty Pods’ career post season line:

286/397/551. 6SB, 3CS. 9 runs, 6 rbi, 12 games.

Who doesn’t want that on their team?

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