Brett Lawrie Is Doing Something

A tweet from Brett Lawrie:

So he’s working out with some degree of zeal. He’s doing deep knee bends, leg lifts and trunk twists and then finishing up with a slimming routine, especially after last night’s London Broil, green-bean casserole and gelatin salad. I get it. Right?

Although, a part of me — the part of me that thinks he hears something in the basement even when he’s not at home — believes I’m missing something. From this pathetic remove of years and brown defeats, I wonder whether he’s invoking a rock and or roll Sousa march or perhaps a popular talkie or a dance that forces The Bandstand to aim their cameras above the girdle.

Maybe he really likes to work out, or maybe he’s conjuring up a secret something known only to Young American Thunderclaps and, hence, not to wasted me. I was really hoping he was talking about exercising — good-boy’s push-ups followed by a half-hour on the vibrating belt machine followed by a restorative crap. But I’m sure he’s not.

Brett Lawrie probably talks quite a bit about things I don’t even know exist, being as I am much, much closer to death than Brett Lawrie is.




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16 Responses to “Brett Lawrie Is Doing Something”

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  1. jw says:

    I read your opening ‘A tweet from Brett Lawrie’ line like a churchman reading gospel: ‘A reading from the book of John’.

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  2. airfigaro says:

    I fear that Brett Lawrie may be baseball’s Elmer Gantry.

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  3. Erik Archer says:

    I saw Young American Thunderclaps open up for Bill Cosby Suicide at The Satyricon.

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  4. Adam says:

    It’s the lyrics to a song by the group LMFAO( I hear they are popular with kids). He’s just tweeting/singing out loud.

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    • mbrady16 says:

      If Lawrie liked LMFAO I would not be surprised at all.

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    • reillocity says:

      Though I cannot be certain, it appears that Adam is submitting that Mr. Lawrie was indeed invoking a rock and or roll Sousa march, and more specifically one crafted by an ensemble with a moniker comprised of the capital letters L,M,F,A, and O. If true, this information alone should not cause one anguish, as perhaps Mr. Lawrie was immersed in a spot of rigorous physical exercise when he paused to touch-type the refrain into his handheld transceiver?

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      • Someanalyst says:

        @reillocity: I believe your analysis to be accurate and generally thorough. I must however take issue with your very last point. You make the common mistake of assuming that data distributed via “social” networks is inherently done via a handheld (or otherwise wireless) transceiver. In fact, even the short-form “social” network (<140 chars) can receive information from any device capable of formatting information according to the "IP" protocol, whether tethered to reality or not.

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    • filihok says:

      It appears that not enough people know about this

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKNWAXRg3iA

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  5. Big Jgke says:

    Young AMERICAN Thunderclaps? I assume you are referring to the continent on which we all reside, rather than the political entity from which Lawrie hails?

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  6. Matty Brown says:

    I would fight Lawrie

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  7. Flo says:

    hahaha you wonder why no one likes him

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  8. jcxy says:

    i’d wager he prefers aspic salad to gelatin salad.

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  9. Aaron55 says:

    Its an indication of his want

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  10. Tom Jatczak says:

    Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle,Wiggle,, Yeah !!!!

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  11. Greg W says:

    Hey could somebody else post a joke, and I will explain it for everyone else here?

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