Buster Posey Squats, Becomes Superhuman

Ed. note: readers be advised: you are about to learn at least six new euphemisms for going to the bathroom.


Ask not what you can do for your toilet, but what your toilet can do for you.

As part of his rehabilitation program, Giants’ catcher Buster Posey has been doing squats. Assumably, these are squats of the weight-lifting variety, but one never knows about these things.

If Backstop Buster decided he wanted to do some extra work while away from the trainer, he should simply choose to sit down when he pees. Normally we danglers stay upright when voiding our bladders, opting to perch ourselves upon the porcelain only when absolutely necessary, but maybe that’s just because we are ugly American’s who despise anything that could be construed as exercise.

Think about it, America. Getting off the throne is a good exercise for your knees and does, in fact, put pressure on your ankles. Posey may be called a pansy in the clubhouse, but he’ll have the last laugh when he can leap a tall building in a single bound.*

I have no knowledge of Backstop Buster’s diet, but I think it’s safe to assume that he isn’t dropping a deuce more than once a day. If this is indeed the case, sitting down while visiting the Tinkle Fairy will help him work out his damaged ankle and become nearly superhuman in the process.

*Claims made in this article are subject to scientific testing and common sense.




Print This Post

Zach is the creator and co-author of RotoGraphs' Roto Riteup series, and RotoGraphs' second-longest tenured writer. You can follow him on twitter.

14 Responses to “Buster Posey Squats, Becomes Superhuman”

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
  1. jason says:

    Good job Zach! You now realize that hundreds (do you have that many readers) of men will now be thinking of this article with their pants down while curling one out. Maybe it’s just me, but I prefer not to have half naked men with poo coming outta their rears thinking of me at that moment.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  2. spliff(TONE) says:

    This was sure stupid. You get paid for this?

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  3. MikeS says:

    Since when do notgraphs and common sense go together?

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  4. Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any assistance is very much appreciated.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  5. Hey there! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog. Is it very difficult to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty fast. I’m thinking about setting up my own but I’m not sure where to begin. Do you have any points or suggestions? Cheers

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  6. Hello there! This is kind of off topic but I need some guidance from an established blog. Is it tough to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty fast. I’m thinking about creating my own but I’m not sure where to begin. Do you have any ideas or suggestions? Appreciate it

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  7. Hey there! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from an established blog. Is it very difficult to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty fast. I’m thinking about creating my own but I’m not sure where to start. Do you have any tips or suggestions? Appreciate it

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  8. Thanks, I have been looking for information about this subject for ages and yours is the best I have found so far.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  9. Hi, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam remarks? If so how do you reduce it, any plugin or anything you can suggest? I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any support is very much appreciated.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  10. gadget says:

    I do love the way you have presented this particular challenge and it does supply me some fodder for thought. However, coming from what I have observed, I just trust as the remarks pack on that men and women stay on point and not embark on a soap box involving some other news du jour. All the same, thank you for this fantastic piece and though I can not really concur with the idea in totality, I respect the point of view.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  11. Exceptional post but I was wondering if you could write a litte more on this subject? I’d be very grateful if you could elaborate a little bit further. Cheers!

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  12. plakat murah says:

    I love what you guys are up too. This kind of clever work and reporting! Keep up the great works guys I’ve included you guys to blogroll.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  13. csi jakarta says:

    This is a terrific web page, would you be involved in doing an interview about how you developed it? If so e-mail me!

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  14. Neat blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere? A design like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog shine. Please let me know where you got your theme. Thanks a lot

    Vote -1 Vote +1

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Current day month ye@r *