Archive for FranceGraphs

Corey Kluber’s Start, As Seen from French Mountain Internet

It was the author’s intention, originally, to utilize a combination of Brooks Baseball’s very useful PITCHf/x game-log information and also MLB.TV to the end of reproducing in these pages the most transcendent of Corey Kluber‘s pitches from his complete-game, 11-strikeout performance on Thursday (box).

Notably, however, that same dumb author’s body is currently located about 15 miles from the Spanish border in the Pyrenees. Beautiful, is one word it would make sense to use. Lacking in the highest-speed of internet, is another collection of words that are relevant in such a case.

In the place of that hypothetical GIF is the more real one embedded here — namely, of the only actual footage available to the author in this instance. Disappointment, is the thing that’s very clearly abounding.


Croyez-Le ou Non: Red Barrett N’Effectue Que 58 Lancers!

Recently, the author announced in these pages that — by way of preparation for a temporary move to Paris, France — that he would produce here a “brief, daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball.” To say that the results have been of the daily variety would either be (a) incorrect or (b) to problematize considerably the idea of “dailiness.”

Regardless, what’s happened is that the author, filled with an emotion cocktail of shame (as a result of his failure to commit to the project) and dread (apropos his mediocre language skills) has endeavored to revisit the daily French exercise here, this afternoon, ahead of his Sunday departure.

The passage featured here is taken from the 1991 edition of Expos Magazine cited previously by the author at the beginning of August — and is excerpted from a longer portion of that publication entitled «Croyez-le ou non», “Believe It or Not.”

Below, the author has produced a (likely flawed) translation of the relevant passage. Below that, there’s commentary regarding certain words or phrases of note (and which are marked by an asterisk) either because (a) those words and phrases are particularly difficult, but the author has grasped their meaning or (b) they are particularly difficult and the author has abandoned all attempts to make sense of them.

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French Exercise: Balentien Trois Circuits du Record Japonais

Barring any inconsistencies among his travel documents — an entirely real contingency, that — the author is relocating for about a year to Paris beginning in the middle of September. In preparation for said move — and in a gesture of supreme self-interest — he has resolved to publish in this space a brief, almost daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball.

What follows is such an exercise — featuring, in this case, a passage from Montreal’s La Presse regarding former major-leaguer Wladimir Balentien’s pursuit of Japan’s single-season home-run record.

For each paragraph, the author has produced a (likely flawed) translation. At the bottom, there’s commentary regarding certain words or phrases of note (and which are marked by an asterisk) either because (a) those words and phrases are particularly difficult, but the author has grasped their meaning or (b) they are particularly difficult and the author has abandoned all attempts to make sense of them.

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Actual French News Articles with “Jeter” in the Title

Jeter
Derek Jeter’s appeal is universal.

While almost entirely devoid of baseball coverage, per se, French (and other francophone) news media appear to have discovered one means of driving traffic already popular in the United States — namely, by invoking the name of popular Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter.

One finds, by way of illustration, that the shortstop’s surname appears in numerous French-language headlines whose attendant articles/posts concern neither baseball, nor the Yankees, nor the longtime shortstop himself.

Below are five recent examples of instances in which French news media have exploited Derek Jeter’s popularity to attract readers to otherwise entirely unrelated pieces.

Title: BlackBerry Prêt à Jeter l’Éponge (link).
Source: Le Vif.
Subject: A popular smartphone manufacturer.
Mentions of Derek Jeter: None.

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Daily French Exercise: Les Blue Jays Balayés

Barring any inconsistencies among his travel documents — an entirely real contingency, that — the author is relocating for about a year to Paris beginning in the middle of September. In preparation for said move — and in a gesture of supreme self-interest — he has resolved to publish in this space a brief, daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball.

What follows is such an exercise — featuring, in this case, a passage from Canoe regarding the New York Yankees’ recent sweep of Toronto.

For each paragraph, the author has produced a (likely flawed) translation. At the bottom, there’s commentary regarding certain words or phrases of note (and which are marked by an asterisk) either because (a) those words and phrases are particularly difficult, but the author has grasped their meaning or (b) they are particularly difficult and the author has abandoned all attempts to make sense of them.

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Daily French Exercise: Ichiro Obtient Son 4000e Coup Sûr

Barring any inconsistencies among his travel documents — an entirely real contingency, that — the author is relocating for about a year to Paris beginning in the middle of September. In preparation for said move — and in a gesture of supreme self-interest — he has resolved to publish in this space a brief, daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball.

What follows is such an exercise — featuring, in this case, a passage from French-language Canadian daily La Presse regarding Ichiro Suzuki’s 4000th hit. The author has included commentary regarding certain words or phrases of note either because (a) those words and phrases are particularly difficult, but the author has grasped their meaning or (b) they are particularly difficult and the author has abandoned all attempts to make sense of them.

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Daily French Exercise: Les Giants sans Rivaux!

Barring any inconsistencies among his travel documents — an entirely real contingency, that — the author is relocating for about a year to Paris beginning in the middle of September. In preparation for said move — and in a gesture of supreme self-interest — he has resolved to publish in this space a brief, daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball.

What follows is such an exercise — featuring, in this case, a passage from actual French sporting paper L’Équipe regarding the San Francisco Giants’ World Series victory over the Detroit Tigers last October. The author has included commentary regarding certain words or phrases of note either because (a) those words and phrases are particularly difficult, but the author has grasped their meaning or (b) they are particularly difficult and the author has abandoned all attempts to make sense of them.

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Daily French Exercise: Les Phillies Résistent

It has recently come to the author’s attention that he’ll be relocating soon — for a not insubstantial portion of the next year, it appears — to Paris, Goddamn France. While the city is noted for excellent cuisine, impressive architecture, and perpetual nudity, its residents (in the manner native to that irascible people) have systematically replaced, in both speech and the extant literature, all of the English words that already exist with a series of (sometimes similar-looking) words which contain random collections of silent vowels and are only pronounced with great difficulty.

With a view both to acquainting himself with this entirely new lexicon and also fulfilling his obligations to the present and absurd weblog, the author has resolved to publish in this space a brief, daily French exercise concerning base-and-ball — a maneuver which critics are already calling “a monument to self-interest” and “nearly useful” and also “unlikely to actually last three days.” The exercises will likely be directed at people who are familiar with language acquisition, generally, but who are not masters of French, specifically. (Because the author himself is and is not those things, respectively.)

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The Greatest BSOHL Story Ever Told

It is springtime, and stories abound on professional athletes who have suddenly discovered that they need to watch what they eat, work out, and whatnot. Coincidentally, this often occurs following a bad year. Not too surprisingly, guess who came to Arizona in the Best Shape Of His Life in 2013?

Frenchy_working_swing

That’s right. Jeff Francoeur realizes that he had a really bad year in 2012, and he needs to make some changes. One might think that it is not really that exceptional for a player coming off a season during which he hit .235/.287/.378 while playing right field as if he was pulling an invisible trailer full of anvils to understand something to be amiss. But let’s face it, players are rarely as frank regarding their own performance as Francoeur is in this article, which I like to think of as Greatest BSOHL Story Ever Told.

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One for Wil(l)neau, or #willmcdonaldthebest

So this is how it ends. Will McDonald (now ExRoyalsReview on Twitter), longtime mainstay of Royals Review, has decided to call it a day after eight years of blogging about the Royals. During that time, Royals Review grew from just some guy’s blog to a team site on the fledgling SB Nation network to perhaps the most popular Royals blog around.

With the management formerly of Royals Authority taking the helm, things should be in good hands. Still, it is hard for many of us to imagine following the Royals without the incentive of knowing the referents for Will’s next brilliantly-written combination of anger and comedy. How will we get through the season without more Royals Bibliomancy or Mitch Maier‘s Letters Home From Baseball Camp, or expressions of irritation over Royals prospect Wil Myers spelling his first name incorrectly.

Will has been a huge inspiration. Don’t hold it against him, but, while I never “worked” at Royals Review, I probably would not be blogging today if it were not for reading Will’s stuff. Will’s posts garnered attention far beyond Royals fandom — I think the first “big break” his blog received was when Keith Law linked to it in one of his ESPN chats. I cannot summarize Will’s work, but that is the nature of all good art. So as a tribute to Will (or “Freneau,” a moniker he adopted in recent times in tribute to a poet from the era of the Revolutionary War) and as a public service, I will briefly go through just a few of McDonald’s best moments of the last few years.

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