Archive for Tweet!

Jamie Moyer Tweets Probably a Oaxacan Word

Moyer Tweet

Because he is afraid both of answers and the truth, the author has not endeavored to confirm that the word Ydhwxactxvery clearly tweeted by former major-league left-hander Jamie Moyer — actually belongs to any of the Oto-Manguean languages. It seems to, however, and that — as America’s celebrities teach us — is what’s most important.


Totally, Actually Unaltered Tweet: Rutledge Love Incoming

For those having a difficult time conceptualizing this particular major league transaction, here is a visual aid courtesy of the NotGraphs InfoGraphs Department:

Josh Rutledge bringning love

Super many thanks to Paul Agnello for keeping up the love vigil and handing this bit of news to us.


Totally Unaltered Tweet: Roenicke Declares Support for Braun

The following tweet, which concerns a real and not fake statement made by Brewers manager Ron Roenicke with regard to outfielder Ryan Braun, is entirely and in-no-way altered from the original (click to embiggen):

Braun


A Totally Unalterted Tweet Illustrated: Scott Kazmir

chips1

chips2


OC Register‘s Jeff Fletcher Leading League in Self-Awareness

It’s a sentiment shared by all the big philosophers, probably, that happiness and mental well-being are the province of those who recognize their myriad shortcomings. To what degree happiness and mental well-being are the province of the OC Register‘s Jeff Fletcher, the present author is unable to comment. That he (i.e. Fletcher) recognizes at least one of his shortcomings, however, is manifestly the case, as the comment attached to his lousy spring-training photograph suggests. To praise briefly Jeff Fletcher’s conduct, is the purpose of this post.


Totally Unaltered Tweet: Tanaka Refuses to Comment

The following tweet, which concerns a real and not fake report regarding Masahiro Tanaka‘s negotiations with certain major-league baseball clubs, is entirely and in-no-way altered from the original (click to embiggen):

Mo Money


Pirates “Most Absurd” Baseball Club, According to Study

According to research conducted by the author this morning in his pajama pants — and reproduced below entirely in the form of two tweets by Tribune-Review beat writer Rob Biertempfel — the Pittsburgh Pirates appear to be the major-league baseball club which most wholly embraces the tenets of absurdism and also, probably, the only club which embraces even one tenet of absurdism.

Camus Tweets


Totally Unaltered Tweet: Dayan Viciedo and the White Sox

The following tweet, which concerns a real and not fake report regarding Dayan Viciedo and the Chicago White Sox, is entirely and in-no-way altered from the original (click to embiggen):

Viciedo


Totally Unaltered Tweet: Cleveland Cuts Bait

The following tweet, which concerns a real and not fake roster move by the Cleveland Indians, is entirely and in-no-way altered from the original (click to embiggen):

Trey DFAd


Cardinals Prospect Tim Cooney Has Our Best Interests in Mind

Around the Christmas holiday, in particular, it’s not uncommon for members of the vulgar crowd to wax earnest about the importance of charity. “It’s better to give than receive,” they say. “It’s better to give than receive,” they say again, a lack of imagination being one of the defining characteristics of that regrettable demographic. Idle chatter, is all it amounts to, so far as this suddenly indignant author is concerned.

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