Charlie Manuel Tries Corpse of Pope Formosus

As droned on about at torturous length during the most recent Perry-Cistulli Hootenanny of the Preposterous, history teaches us that Pope Stephen VII tried the decaying corpse of Pope Formosus way back yonder in the year 897 — when even those who weren’t coconuts were coconuts. However, as the history of history teaches us, it was not Pope Stephen VI but rather Charlie Got Damn Manuel who presided over the Synodus Horrenda.

So stand down, Stevie Seven, Charlie’s got it from there …

Charlie Manuel and His Popery

Dead Popes of the world, be admonished: Charlie Got Damn Manuel will get to the bottom of this yet.




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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.


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Keegs
Guest
Keegs
3 years 3 months ago

This is sublime.

War2d2
Guest
3 years 3 months ago

This. This is what the Internet was made for.

jcxy
Guest
jcxy
3 years 3 months ago

I love the attention to detail. Manuel’s face on the–is that a Maltese variety–cross boosts this from excellent to, as another commenter so eloquently put it, the sublime.

Marcat
Guest
Marcat
3 years 3 months ago

Can’t wait ’til ‘ol Manuel gets his hands on John Paul II.

Nick
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Nick
3 years 3 months ago

I so hoped this would happen. NotGraphs fulfills all my hopes and dreams yet again.

dockmarm
Guest
dockmarm
3 years 3 months ago

…it’s full of stars!

tylersnotes
Member
3 years 3 months ago

Now the reason we have that guy up there is he’s uh, y’know, he’s a cot damn Carolingian. I hear, y’know, uh, guys sayin this guy Formosus, he’s, uh, y’know, he’s even friendly with Lambert. *Laughs* Not that way, y’know what I mean.

Y’know, uh, that’s bullshit is what it is. Cut his damn fingers off and throw him in the Tiber is what we need to do and anyone who tells you different is, uh, I’ll tell him where he can go.

Chandler
Guest
Chandler
3 years 3 months ago

I thought this was gonna be about how Manuel was trying him in center cause he liked the veteran leadership and cadaverous grit he brought to the table

tylersnotes
Member
3 years 3 months ago

not center, but probably they’d find a reason to give him at bats ahead of dom brown.

The Rajah
Guest
The Rajah
3 years 3 months ago

But make no mistake, Formosus couldn’t hit a curve to save his nuts.

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