Colby Rasmus, Pitchman

This should not be left to die in the comment thread on this morning’s post about Colby Rasmus, Enigma:

Big Jgke says:
August 27, 2014 at 9:40 am
As a Jays fan, what I’ll miss most when Colby gets his inevitable overpay from some other organization, is hearing his unintelligible southern drawl on local radio ads for shady car dealerships.

I can’t be the only person who went to look for this. (Indeed, when I reloaded the comments, I saw that I was not.)

Were they not allowed to say “Blue Jays” in the ad? “Toronto’s ballclub?” Really?

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Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.

13 Responses to “Colby Rasmus, Pitchman”

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  1. dang says:

    This seems like a parody but it isn’t. I’m dyin.


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  2. Monkey Never Cramp says:

    Kawasaki’s one is on another level

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  3. Big Jgke says:

    I lack the words to explain how I feel right now.

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  4. Pork Sale says:

    Holy hoppin horseballs. He’s not a hall of famer….. Yet. I’ll make the 2000 mile drive to Bannerman’s place so I can deliver him the look of disbelief that I have in my mind. Dingers for dough.

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  5. Joser says:

    “Blue Jays” is a trademark, and you aren’t allowed to use it in a commercial context without permission. I doubt their lawyers would want them to give permission to any unaffiliated business — much less a car dealership (car salesmen being one of the few legal professions that consistently rate below politicians in public perception) — lest it look like the team was somehow endorsing the company. (Not to mention diluting the value of the agreements they do make with other sponsors).

    All that said, it really just makes this even better — like Rasmus is a little unclear on the name of the team he plays for. One imagines him glancing down at his jersey before the start of every interview to remind himself. (“sʎɐſ ǝnlq”? he mumbles to himself “WTF are sʎɐſ ǝnlq”?)

    As someone in that comment thread said, it’s total Boomhauer: SomekindofDangOlBallTeamFromDangTorontoBirdsOrSumpin’

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