Dave Cameron Blink Watch

As someone who hangs on NotGraphs’ every word and doesn’t read any other websites and won’t ever leave me otherwise you-know-what will happen, you’ll remember the footage embedded here of managing editor Dave Cameron’s inaugural appearance on last Monday’s edition of MLB Network’s Clubhouse Confidential.

While interested parties have noted many flaws with Cameron’s appearance (like, for example, the whole face part of his body), a great deal of attention has been focused on the frequency with which Cameron blinks — which is to say, “almost never.”

The present author counts two of them (i.e. blinks) — one at the 0:37 mark, and another at 2:30 — plus a nose scratch at 0:23 that maybe is or is not accompanied by a third blink.

In any case, this important information is relevant to your life insofar as Dave Cameron is making another appearance on Clubhouse Confidential tonight — one that we can scrutinize in ways that ultimately contribute to Cameron’s burgeoning body dysmorphia.

The show airs at 5:30pm ET, again at 7:30pm ET, and then a third time in a fever dream you’re gonna have tonight.



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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.


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