David Ortiz and the F Word: A Comprehensive Look

The Boston Red Sox have been in an intense, high-stress playoff race as their team has crumbled during September, allowing the Tampa Bay Rays to climb back into the Wild Card race. Although this is bad news for Boston, this is good news for everybody else. Not just because of schadenfreude (although largely because of schadenfreude), but also because this means we get to hear David Ortiz say The F Word (i.e., “fuck”), one of my personal favorite pasttimes and something Ortiz is actually quite experienced with. Observe:

August 2009, on not receiving an RBI on what he thought was a base hit: “Fucking scorekeeper keeps fucking shit up.”

April 2010, on what he thought of sportswriters making claims on small sample sizes, including bonus non-fuck swears: “You guys wait ’til shit happens, then you can talk shit. Two fucking games, and already you fuckers are going crazy. What’s up with that, man? Fuck. Fucking 160 games left. That’s a bitch (note: unsure which expletive actually goes here). One of you fuckers got to go ahead and hit for me.”

June 2011, on Joe Girardi’s disdain for bat flips: “Fuck that shit.”

Monday, on losing the first half of a doubleheader to the Baltimore Orioles: “Fuck this shit.”

Tuesday, on Curt Schilling: “Fuck off.”

August 2011, on leaving 16 men on base: “Fuck.”

A diverse usage of one of the English language’s greatest sentence enhancers from Big Papi. One can only hope the Red Sox remain mired in their struggles just to see where he’ll go next.




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Yirmiyahu
Member
Yirmiyahu
4 years 8 months ago

When you go to school for sports journalism, there must be a specific class on how to print quotes from athletes. “You guys wait til [stuff] happens, then you can talk [stuff]. Two [stink]ing games.” The bracket is your friend.

André
Guest
André
4 years 8 months ago

I prefer the minimalist approach:

“You guys wait […], then you can talk […] Two […] games.”

or the maximalist:

“You guys wait til [I start hitting again] […], then you can talk [about what a great hitter I am]. Two […] games [is not enough time to form conclusions about an entire season].”

Jason
Guest
Jason
4 years 8 months ago

Fuck.

Navin
Guest
4 years 8 months ago

It’s so hard to fucking hate Ortiz.

bluejaysstatsgeek
Guest
bluejaysstatsgeek
4 years 8 months ago

No it f*&^ing well isn’t.

Josh
Guest
Josh
4 years 8 months ago

I don’t know why I laughed when Ortiz said ‘Fuck this shit’ after losing to the Orioles

shred the gnar
Guest
shred the gnar
4 years 8 months ago

McCann owns the “f” word. Anyone who listens to a Braves (RADIO, not Skip) broadcast can tell you that. I think it’s somehow acceptable when it comes from a teddy bear of a man.

Case and point: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fy-SMnDLfQ

SiddFinch
Guest
SiddFinch
4 years 8 months ago

Someone must have a link to the Eckersley slip-ups on NESN…

Jonathan
Guest
Jonathan
4 years 8 months ago

Eckersley did his absolute best to prove he was ill-suited for color commentary with the “Justin Masterbat- Justin Masterson” fiasco.

Hilarity Ensues
Guest
Hilarity Ensues
4 years 8 months ago

Thanks for writing this, it made my week.

Something to sweeten the bitterness of the BoSox skid.

allan wood
Guest
4 years 8 months ago

This is pretty fucking far from comprehensive.

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