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D’Backs Rookie Hazing: Slightly More Straightforward

Earlier today, the wise and enterprising Bradley presented us with an equally the rookie hazing of an equally wise and enterprising team: the Tampa Bay Rays, who went the route of forcing rookies to dress up as various characters (and apparently, one rookie was dressed as a pregnant green fairy) because, you know, they’re rookies. Those bastards.

The Diamondbacks are no stranger to this anti-rookie ideal, but they chose to go with a much different method of hazing the new meat, something a bit more straightforward in its shame.

Bikinis! How embarrassing!

I’m honestly not sure who gets hazed worse here, the rookies who have to wear the bikinis or those who have to look at them (especially you, the reader!).

Also, the question is raised: how in the world do people who spend so much of their lives in Arizona (or even Reno, if they were down in Triple-A) end up so white in the middle of September? I, for one, am concerned about the levels of Vitamin D around the Arizona clubhouse.