Discovered: A Ballplayer Named After Engelbert Humperdinck

I will not at this time recount for you the series of considerations and life decisions that led me to conduct a Google search for the terms “Engelbert Humperdinck + baseball,” but know that from this peculiar tree, velvety fruit has been harvested.

Please regard, with tensed hips and phallus, the following passage from Milton H. Jamail’s book, Venezuelan Bust, Baseball Boom

Check this shit out

And here he is, that Enyelbert Soto.

What I’m saying is that there exists a player of this, our baseball named after this, our Engelbert Humperdinck.

What I’m really saying is: Boil me in oil, for Engelbert Humperdinck played baseball.

GOAT




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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.

36 Responses to “Discovered: A Ballplayer Named After Engelbert Humperdinck”

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  1. Eddie Izzard says:

    He’s dead you know

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    • Dayn Perry says:

      He’s not! I checked! So there!

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    • Dorothy Whalen says:

      According to the comments, Eddie, everyone saw your introduction to Engelbert Humperdinck already, ( the film is shown as an introduction at all Engelbert’s concerts ) Funny! You should be happy, they remembered some of the names you gave. So you see, he is not dead, but very alive and still singing!

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  2. My username links to the overture to Hansel und Gretel by the original and true Engelbert Humperdinck.

    P.S. As a kid I decided Engelbert Humperdinck’s middle name was Quigleymore. Engelbert Quigleymore Humperdinck.

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  3. Prince Humperdinck says:

    I’d love to play a game of baseball, but I’ve got my country’s 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I’m swamped.

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  4. Iraqis for Faulkner says:

    Disturbing facial hair, on that dude.

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  5. reillocity says:

    Enyelbert was slinging in Japan as recently as
    last season
    .

    I reckon he won’t perform “Release Me” anytime soon given that 9.68 ERA.

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  6. Mike Green says:

    So, Enyelbert Soto was named after Engelbert. It probably means Leance Soto (a fairly Blue Jay prospect) was named after one of those 60s wide receivers named Lance (down Dayn!)- Alworth or Rentzel.

    There was a wide receiver named Lance
    who…

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  7. Robert J. Baumann says:

    Hello, this album has — pressed into its impeccably grey-flecked vinyl designed to mirror Mr. Humperdinck’s infallible hair — recordings of twelve great songs. It also has, sadly, “Release Me,” a thirteenth song which cannot be described, by any means, as “great” or even “neat” or really even as “okay.” Still, we thought we would let you know here, right on the album’s sheathing, that “Release Me” also is on this album — for the purpose of warning you. Feel free to skip “Release Me” and listen only to the other twelve songs, which are, we are quite adamant, great.

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  8. Rosemary says:

    Hope this Baseball player followed suit and hit as many “Home Runs” as “The” Engelbert Humperdinck, the King OF Romance, still singing strong with 47 years in the Music Industry under his belt. Go see a show..go buy his new Duet CD “Engelbert Calling” being released in March, with Legends such as Elton John, Gene Simmons, Willie Nelson, Cliff Richards, Olivia Newton John etc. etc. singing along with him! Now that is what you call Magic!

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  9. Terri Dtalia says:

    What’s in a name…For Engelbert Humperdinck it represents a lifetime of singing beautiful music and pleasing millions of fans for the past 47 years. (And still doing so, as previously stated) Hard act to follow……

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  10. Linda Fairbairn says:

    Engelbert Humperdinck (Arnold George Dorsey) is VERY MUCH ALIVE. I saw him twice, in concert last year, and his new CD is due out in March. Check his Facebook page and his website http://www.engelbert.com. He is still touring round the world, and does a nearly 2 hour show. He has 7 shows scheduled for the first 2 weeks of Feb. in CA and AZ.

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  11. Dinaly Garcia says:

    ENGELBERT HUMPERDINCK “what’s in a name”
    A true “LIVING” Legend !!
    the best entertainer of all time…
    THE KING OF ROMANCE ♥♥♥

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  12. Marjorie says:

    Fell in love with him and his music the first time I encountered him. You got it correct THE KING OF ROMANCE.

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  13. The Return of Rambo Diaz says:

    I thought Dayn Perry was the King of Romance.

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  14. Lora says:

    Thank God Engelbert recorded that fantastic song “Release Me ” which kept the Beatles from reaching number 1 on the charts again! It put him on the map for the entire world to enjoy..then and now! Long live the King of Romance!

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  15. Jill says:

    Engelbert Humperdinck….”the popular singer of the 1960′s”??? Where have you been? Yes….Release Me in 1967…put the King of Romance on the Front burner…and the rest is beautiful history!! Here we are in 2014 and HE is still the King of Romance! 47 years in the business and still retains that title…not too shabby, huh?? We sure know where Engelbert Humperdinck is; at the top of his game!!!
    Where is Enyelbert Soto, these days?

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  16. Cathy says:

    Oh the things that “some people” have missed out on…and I say that because those certain comments would not be made, if “some people” knew what they were talking about! What an amazing 47 years it has been to watch and listen to Engelbert and his most Beautiful songs! A True pleasure and joy to be a part of the Humperdinck World and I am NOT talking baseball! I invite anyone that would like to really know more, and hear more, to visit his website…http://www.engelbert.com. and then get linked to his FB page for the latest news, and updates, and enjoy the photos, videos, and more! Check out his tour dates…and yes, still touring around the world! He has an amazing Duets CD to be released in March, which is filled with other great singers, such as Smokey Robinson, Gene Simmons, Willie Nelson, Olive Newton John, and so many more! For 47 years,Engelbert is a class act and is greatly Loved, Respected, and Appreciated around the world! Most certainly, one of a kind…the ONE and ONLY!

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  17. JoAnn says:

    Love, Love, Love Engelbert Humperdinck!!!! He is amazing!!! He has millions of adoring fans all over the world!!!! Many hits such as Release Me and After the Lovin….the list goes on and on!!!! He is and always will be the King of Romance!!!!

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  18. Dayn Perry says:

    What the hell is going on in here?

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    • Shirley says:

      What’s going on is some of Engelbert’s fans are expressing how they feel about this wonderful, shy, kind, gentle entertainer. And yes, he will entertain you if you go to one of his concerts. He is on stage for 90 minutes singing, dancing, telling cute stories, and getting totally involved with his audiences. They love him to pieces, and you would too, if you saw him perform in a live concert. There’s just no doubt about it – Engelbert is the best of the best!!!

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    • Cathy says:

      Hi Dayne. Just spreading the news and sharing the Love for our Engelbert!

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    • Yirmiyahu says:

      Did someone post this link on an Engelbert Humperdinck fan forum???

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  19. Emilia Palhinha de Epa says:

    Dear Enge, how put it in words? Just sing, as only You Know!

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  20. Dreama says:

    Engelbert Humperdinck, that became famous in the 60′s, is still touring the whole world. The Best Singer and Entertainer ever ! Cant wait until his new Duet CD comes out very soon>>> “Engelbert Calling” . We love Enge !!

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  21. Dianne says:

    Without a doubt, anyone would know who “Engelbert Humperdinck” is, if only they would open there ears & eyes to the music & shows that this “magical” man performs year after year. For 47 years he has sold out venues all over the world & still going strong. The anticipation of the new “Duets CD” is growing day by day. As all of Mr. Humperdinck’s fans will agree, this will be a top #1 album for him. With friends like, Elton John, Gene Simmons,Kenny Rogers,Willy Nelson, Smokey Robinson, Johnny Mathis, Olivia Newton John, Seal, to name a few joining Engelbert, it’s sure to hit the charts in no time. I challenge you to listen, see & go to one of the best concerts you will ever encounter. So Mr. Eddie Izzard, now you know that Engelbert Humperdinck is in fact still performing & going strong day after day, no matter how you pronounce his name he is still the BEST.

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  22. Germaine says:

    Engelbert Humperdinck!!! Loved and admired all around the world just as much today as 47 years ago!! Our King of Romance still has sell-out shows everywhere he goes. Fabulous performer and person.

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  23. Marge Schott says:

    my panties wet

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  24. Mike Piazza says:

    I’m a fan

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  25. After The Lovin says:

    ♫♫♪♫

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  26. james wilson says:

    Having played ‘Bert’s show for a few years back in the day, I can reliably inform you that he was known at that time for bringing the high hard one. What age and a player’s natural decline have left him I make no claim.

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