Like all great correspondences — the famous one between John and Abigail Adams, for example, and the other famous one between noted 20th century pop sensations Milli and Vanilli — my own correspondence with my friend Ross will someday become the object of much literary interest in this country and abroad.
While the frenzied masses will have to wait for its publication (i.e. the aforementioned correspondence’s) until just after my own death, an excerpt from one of Ross’s recent electronic letters is suitable for blockquoting in these pages.
Ross writes (or wrote, seven days ago, I should say):
On another note, hunt down recent highlights of Edwin Encarnacion stroking a dongpiece (he did so in today’s matinee game at Milwaukee, so you can see fresh evidence on mlb.com). Notice that every time he’s shown rounding 1st, he is carrying his right arm in what might be described as a palsied t-rex pose. He seems to do this invariably.
Like any gentleman of taste, I need only hear the phrase “palsied t-rex pose” once to have my curiosity piqued duly.
Abiding by said curiosity, I not only sought out some representative clips of Edwin Encarnacion, but then proceeded to render those clips into GIF form for the enjoyment of at least 10 or 12 people, as follows.
From June 20th, at Milwaukee:
From June 18th, at Milwaukee:
From May 30th, vs. Baltimore:
Indeed, in all three clips — and, in particular, that third one — Encarnacion does appear to be pumping his left arm with considerable vigor even while the right remains eerily still. Further inspection of other clips reveals that this practice is more the rule than the exception for Encarnacion.
“Why,” the reader might ask, “does Encarnacion do this weird thing?” To which question the author can only reply, “I don’t know.” And to which question late actor Robert Stack would likely reply, “Find out next time… on Unsolved Mysteries.”
RIP, Robert Stack:
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