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EMERGENCY: DAVE CAMERON ON TELEVISION

You may have come here expecting to see perhaps one of Carson Cistulli’s studious studies of a Cameron-on-Clubhouse-Confidential, complete with Blink+ statistics and Frog Mouth annotations, but this is an emergency; we here at NotGraphs are in a State of Emergency. A metaphysical Mississippi.

Last night, this image hit our servers and it hit our servers hard:

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Needless to say, the 2003 Dell Inspiron 5150 laptop that wholly runs NotGraphs melted inside its frame when this cellphone-daguerreotype appeared. Yes, that is FanGraphs editor in chief Dave Cameron, a-wheelin’ and a-dealin’, a-gamblin’ and a-wrastlin’ with the WAR cards — or something.

Actually, I’m not tooooooootally 100% clear on what this is supposed to be promoting, but perhaps through the magic of science we can enhance the image and see better the intention. Consider this slightly less worst version and attempt to understand the purpose here; gaze into his world-weary eyes; study his oddly pink hand and acceptably-coiffed haired; what is the answer to the mystery?; why have you brought us here, Dave Cameron?; is the journey, perhaps, the destination?

Regardez-vouz:

Dashing Dave

What are you trying to tell us, Dave?! Do you want me to pick a card? Or are you just exhibiting the necessary motions to finish your taxing shift aboard this gambling ship we call a blogger’s life? Does the next card spell out our future? We can’t understand you!!!