Even Today, Big Pun Still Considered Most Valuable Player

Nearly actual reportage conducted by this internet weblog has revealed that, despite his frequent claims to the contrary — distilled to their essence, most notably, in the 1998 hit single embedded here — late Bronx-born rapper Big Pun remains the most valuable player to basically anyone with some combination of (a) ears and (b) a heart.

“I can confirm having both a pair of working ears and also a heart,” a real person would probably say, for example, if prompted by an author from this site. “And I can also confirm that Big Pun remains both valuable and also a player to this day, even despite how he’s dead.”

Would say another, theoretically: “Whether elaborating upon the precise dimensions of his phallus, making less-than-subtle references to psychoactive drugs, or celebrating oral sex in all its glorious forms, Big Pun conducted himself as a model — I’m prepared to say “most valuable” — player at all times. His legacy continues.”

In fact, idle speculation demonstrates that, of the many people who hypothetically could have been consulted in the composition of this post, only a small minority would likely have suggested that anyone besides Big Pun should really even be considered for the distinction of “most valuable player.”

In conclusion, the author has created a flimsy pretense upon which to make a beloved and dirty song part of his meaningless day.



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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.


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nice
Guest
nice

he clearly states “im not a player”

how can he be the mvp if he isnt even playing the game?

DominicanRepublican
Member
DominicanRepublican

Because part of The Game is not acknowledging player-status. Crushing a lot is also of utmost importance.

Vijay
Guest
Vijay

You’re still a hater.

Guy Smiley
Guest
Guy Smiley

You are forgetting one Lamont Coleman aka Big L who once claimed “if rap was a game I’d be MVP”. Of course, his MVP stood for “the Most Valuable Poet on the m-i-c’. You have now been educated.

nice
Guest
nice

The MVP is great and all but it is really all about the MBP, Most Ballinist Player.

http://rapgenius.com/Jermaine-dupri-welcome-to-atlanta-coast-2-coast-remix-lyrics#note-1251413

RC
Member
Member
RC

He makes his own rules, b****, call him “the Mayor”.

Boof Bonser
Guest
Boof Bonser

Ah, but you forget that Big L was referencing an esteemed gentleman named Big Daddy Kane, who was first to proclaim that, if rap were in fact a game, he would be M-V-P. Difficult to determine value in rap when you compare across eras though.

Gabes
Guest
Gabes

Rhymes above Replacement?
Weighted Rhymes created plus?
Old-School folks might still use Rhymes batted in, but we know how context-dependent that stat can be, I mean how good would Ma$e have been if he wasn’t rapping after Puffy?

Guy Smiley
Guest
Guy Smiley

I can’t forget something I didn’t know! :)

Ghostface Killah AKA Tony Starks AKA Ghostdini
Guest
Ghostface Killah AKA Tony Starks AKA Ghostdini

shit is wack

DITC
Guest
DITC

I always wonder how much better he could have been if he did’t eat himself to death.

jcxy
Guest
jcxy

I fear a definitional debate–is it better to be valuable or the greatest?

Recall that in 1997 Big Willie Style proclaimed that he “met Ali; [he] told me *I’m* the greatest”.

It’s possible that Nas wrote that line though.

Internet Jackson
Guest
Internet Jackson

“Why yous couldn’t measure my dick with six rulers, fellas! I’m tellin ya!” – Little Big Punisher as a boy, engaging in schoolyard braggadocio among a crowd of toughs, go-boys and dandies.

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