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Extry, Extry: Carlos Santana Has Someone

Posted By Dayn Perry On June 3, 2011 @ 11:22 am In Extry Extry,Investigative Reporting Investigation Team | 6 Comments

That’s Indians catcher Carlos Santana pictured above. At first blush, you might think that Mr. Santana is looking a little forlorn and world-weary. However, that’s highly unlikely. That’s because, as the unimpeachable Wikipedia tells us

Carlos Santana (born April 8, 1986) is a Dominican Republic professional baseball player, who is currently a catcher and first baseman with the Cleveland Indians of Major League Baseball’s American League. His best friend is Hayden Clarence.

It’s good to have friends. It’s even better to have best friends. And even better than that is when your besty is the inestimable Hayden Clarence. But who is Hayden Clarence?

The NotGraphs Investigative Reporting Investigation Team answered the call and, as is their indolent wont, did just enough to meet the bare-minimum standards of contractually obligated duty before giving up and mumbling something about it being time for mid-morning tea and having problems with their magnifying glasses and not being able to stand the smell of computers. In other words, a Google Image search turned up nothing illuminating, and a review of the Wikipedia editing logs turned up nothing that made sense.

But the takeaway is that Carlos Santana and Hayden Clarence like to giggle at the same things, and isn’t that what it’s really all about?

Hosannas to NotGraphs reader Sean R., who took a break from his daily routine of sex/one-arm push-ups/physics problems/sex to pass along this bit of eureka.


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