Extry, Extry: John Lackey Not Unfeeling Monster

Every word on the internet to the contrary, the footage you see here seems to suggest that John Lackey — who has recently not only divorced his cancer-addled wife but also called her repeatedly to ask if her refrigerator is running — is not an unfeeling monster.

In fact, Lackey was roused enough by Boston prospect Ryan Lavarnway’s first major-league home run to offer a combination high-five/Top Gun-style hug to the young catcher.

When asked about the sequence after the game, Lackey said nothing, instead taking NotGraphs into his masculine embrace.




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Carson Cistulli occasionally publishes spirited ejaculations at The New Enthusiast.


21 Responses to “Extry, Extry: John Lackey Not Unfeeling Monster”

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  1. Navin says:

    What if NotGraphs didn’t want a hug from John Lackey? What a jerk.

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  2. Big Jgke says:

    Hey John Lackey, why the long face?

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  3. TheGrandslamwich says:

    That could not be further from “Top Gun-style.” Without a homo-erotic butt slap, nothing is “Top Gun-style.”

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  4. juan pierre's mustache says:

    I think Lackey got a glimpse of the wheel-of-fortune style spinner that the Boston sportswriters keep in their secret treehouse for when they have to decide which player is most at fault for a Boston team losing. This year, the wheel has no distinct sections; it’s just a big circle with Lackey’s face on it, which Shaughnessy is spinning over and over while alternately laughing and weeping.

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  5. Cliff Lee's Changeup says:

    Does this mean he’ll pitch better? Because otherwise Lavarnway might not like him quite as much going forward.

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