FanGraphs Trades Eno Sarris to Baseball Prospectus

sarris

INTERNET, USA — In a move that would be considered shocking if anyone actually cared, baseball-nerd homepage Fangraphs has traded Eno Sarris to another site for baseball pencil pushers, Baseball Prospectus, for a 2014 first-round pick.

FanGraphs CEO and self-made millionaire David Appelman lauded Sarris as “being very good at whatever it is he does,” and added “we’ll be sorry to see him go, I’m sure.”

Sarris was unable to be reached for comment but did tweet “wut” soon after the news broke, which was immediately followed by a tweet ranking a beer no one has ever heard of. Sources indicate that Jeff Sullivan was originally in the mix for a trade, but Sullivan indicated he would exercise his 5000-posts rights, given to writers who have logged 5,000 posts on a site.

Baseball Prospectus editor-in-chief Ben Lindbergh plans to use Sarris and his BBWAA card to ramp up coverage of awkward interviews in locker rooms all over the bay area of California. “It’s an obvious missing piece from our site,” said Lindbergh on a conference call with reporters. “I mean, he’ll do fantasy stuff too,” he added. “But I’m really excited to land that coveted interview about comic books with Pat Neshek.”

Signs are not yet clear as to how FanGraphs will use their 2014 first-round pick, as those things don’t actually exist for baseball writers, but insiders suspect Appelman will try to package it with Dayn Perry’s contract in a move to acquire additional server space.




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David G. Temple is the Managing Editor of TechGraphs and a contributor to FanGraphs, NotGraphs and The Hardball Times. He hosts the award-eligible podcast Stealing Home. Dayn Perry once called him a "Bible Made of Lasers." Follow him on Twitter @davidgtemple.


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Simon
Guest
Simon
3 years 3 months ago

Since when can draft picks be traded?

kdm628496
Member
kdm628496
3 years 3 months ago

it’s a competitive balance pick

JC
Guest
JC
3 years 3 months ago

A first-rounder for Sarris? What a steal!

Bryz
Guest
3 years 3 months ago

No! Now where will I get my interludes?!

Hitler but Sadder
Guest
Hitler but Sadder
3 years 3 months ago

Honestly good riddance– just glad that little we didn’t that horrible pipsqueak Lindbergh and his silly obsession with catcher framing stats in return.

Hitler but Sadder
Guest
Hitler but Sadder
3 years 3 months ago

What an idiot, can’t even conjugate a sentence properly.

cass
Guest
cass
3 years 3 months ago

You can conjugate a verb. You can’t conjugate a sentence.

ElJosharino
Member
ElJosharino
3 years 3 months ago

What does this mean for BeerGraphs? Should Eno be registering beerprospectus.com? Is BAR about to be replaced with BARP?

cass
Guest
cass
3 years 3 months ago

I have it on good authority that the new measure will actually be “Beers Under Replacement Pitcher”, aka BURP.

Eddie
Guest
Eddie
3 years 3 months ago

Are you serious Clark?

Nav
Guest
3 years 3 months ago

Dayn has a no-trade clause, right?

Alexander Nevermind
Guest
Alexander Nevermind
3 years 3 months ago

Request for NotGraphs feature: MLB players with Eno’s hair from this photo

Alexander Nevermind
Guest
Alexander Nevermind
3 years 3 months ago

I’ll let the brain trust decide on whether or not to include the glasses

Tim
Guest
Tim
3 years 3 months ago

It’s actually ten-and-five rights: at least 5,000 posts, at least ten of which are good.

Estimating who is ineligible under the second part of this post is left to the reader.

Mr. Observant
Guest
Mr. Observant
3 years 3 months ago

Zing-a-ding ding.

Mr. Observant
Guest
Mr. Observant
3 years 3 months ago

Since when is Andre the Giant’s illegitimate son a ‘writer’ for NotGraphs? Zah?

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