A DeLorean Hovercraft, AT&T Park, and Mediocrity

So, that happened Friday night, in beautiful San Francisco. AT&T Park, man. One of the best.

I’ve always assumed that it would be easier to support a mediocre baseball team if the stadium in which it played wasn’t a soulless slab of mostly concrete. Not that the Giants are mediocre — not at all. But I imagine 2005 through 2008 were more bearable for Giants fans because of AT&T Park.

My point — because, unfortunately, everything comes back to my life as a Blue Jays supporter — is that it’d be a lot easier to support the forever-mediocre Blue Jays at an AT&T Park-like ballpark. Not that the Rogers Centre — another stadium shamelessly named after a telecommunications company in the explicit and disgusting support of capitalism — is completely soulless. It’s like an old car at this point. Still works. Incredible memories, including some firsts. Some great work has been done to it, A to B, all that nonsense. But I’d rather have a new car. I’d rather have AT&T Park. Obviously. I mean, it’s right on the water. Open-air. Ted Williams’ famous quote — “They invented the All-Star game for Willie Mays” — is on one of walls inside. People wear those silly panda hats. DeLorean Hovercrafts show up in the cove. Yeah, life would be a lot easier. But we can’t choose our ballparks. Or, I believe, our mediocre baseball teams.

Anyway, I have buried the lede: the NotGraphs Investigative Reporting Investigation Team has confirmed — moments ago — that San Francisco is, in fact, the future.

GIF credit: Internet sensation, @SAJagfire.