GIF: Johnny Damon Has Impressed the Ladyfolk
The handsomist is no doubt aware that the fairer, substantially more impregnate-able sex loves nothing so much as the sight of a Gentleman at Work. As the succeeding action-news footage will prove, this is especially the case when the handsomist in question is one Johnny Damon, with beard of might and pecker of firebolt …
My only disappointment? Whatever the young lady has on her finger made me think, for a fugitive moment, that she was smoking a cigarette — a Virgina Slim, one assumes — in the stands. And only with a cigarette is the already beautiful and multitudinous elevated to the sublime.
And so I invite you, Lady of Claret Breeches, to watch me blog some time from atop my ordure. Would you not be similarly titillated, Lady of Claret Breeches?
(HT: The prepossessing Big Daddy V)
For all her native beauty, this poor young woman can’t even find a sweater that covers both her shoulders at once. “The horror,” one says to oneself — before typing it in an internet comment.
Her sweater is from the 80s. The ballplayer is from the aughts. The cigarette is from the 60s. There are time-based multitudes here. Multitudes.
Hey Cistulli it’s spelt whore, not horror. A woman not covering both shoulders isn’t a horror. She’s a whore.
Later, Johnny Damon will take her to Cleveland’s finest steak house. Baked potatoes will be served.
pecker of firebolt
Probably more information than I’d expect a reporter to be able to offer.
Now contrast Lady of Claret Breeches’ reaction with that of the becapped gentleman seated to her rear who found the entirety of these events unworthy of removing his left elbow from its comfortable perch atop the padded railing.
I think he’s the lead actor in weekend at Bernie’s 7
Well, I guess we can all assume her womb isn’t barren. She wore her crimson jeans in order to hide the leakage from her bleeding vagine. Lo and behold, like sharks in the water smelling blood, the Cleveland outfield smelt the menstrual blood and are circling in. After all, the best time to bang a cleat chaser is when she is ovulating, because you can’t impregnate her. Thereby you can’t be gold-dug. Remember the Cleveland baseballers motto, “Practice safe sex by having a safe word and store the safe word in your safe place… oh… and please pass the Valtrex and poi.”
wow
wow indeed.
That’s a finger splint, not a Virginia Slims coffin nail, on her hand. Perhaps she took a fastball to the hand during BP.