GIF: Nolan Ryan Is Super Judgmental Now

Many able baseballing commentators have noted that the media coverage of Texas Ranger (principal) owner and president Nolan Ryan is perhaps exaggerated relative to his actual role in assembling the team currently playing in the ALCS — for which achievement general manager Jon Daniels and his colleagues are largely responsible.

For me, personally, it’s fine. Daniels certainly deserves credit, but the media will always tell the most interesting available story — and that’s Ryan. The thing I absolutely can not tolerate is how super judgmental Ryan has become recently.

Like, consider this interaction I had with the former ace pitcher just last night:

Me: Hey, Nolan Ryan how do you think these shoes look with these pants I’m wearing?

Nolan Ryan:

Me: Oh, okay. Well, anyway, I just wanted to look decent, because I’m going out to the new Thai place that just opened. Do you like their food?

Nolan Ryan:

Me: Seriously, Nolan Ryan? You’re just gonna roll your eyes at me like that? You’re over 60. Shouldn’t you behave more maturely? Like, a mature person?

Nolan Ryan:

Me: [Weeping softly.]

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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

9 Responses to “GIF: Nolan Ryan Is Super Judgmental Now”

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  1. phoenix2042 says:

    i would be terrified to pitch for the rangers if i knew the god of all pitchers was sitting right there judging me.

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  2. Aaron Whitehead says:

    Did you ever start talking to someone and suddenly get stunned by the grotesque vapors wafting from their mouth? I think that’s what happened to Nolan here.
    “And by the way — Good GOD, you’ve had enough onion dip!”

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  3. Who says:

    I was really hoping that the last GIF would’ve been Nolan Ryan’s classic fight with Robin Ventura.

    I am disappoint.

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  4. Resolution says:

    At last we get closure on Carson being a middle aged, yet fairly attractive blonde who on at least one occasion has worn the color red. Hooray.

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