Great Moments in Baldness: Wash

Rangers manager/America’s favorite cackling bedlamite Ron Washington is, as you are probably aware, bald. But he is not bald in the sense of merely being in possession of a hairless top floor, like, say, Lex Luthor. Rather, Wash’s baldness contains multitudes. This you shall soon see …

So multitudinous is his baldness that we now have a category called “Great Moments in Baldness.” If not for Ron Washington, there would be no such thing as a Great Moment in Baldness. The inverse formulation — if not for Great Moments in Baldness, there would be no Ron Washington — is obviously not true. But still.

This has been your Daguerreotype of the Evening.

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9 Responses to “Great Moments in Baldness: Wash”

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  1. Person says:

    I honestly read this as “Great Moments in Badass” originally.

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  2. mattc says:

    That hair configuration is the sign and signal of an ancient order of monks: the Brothers of Perpetual Bunting.

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  3. America’s favorite cackling bedlamite

    This turn of phrase will not stop spinning.

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  4. Yirmiyahu says:

    The baldness wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t have so much hair. Like, it’s a mini-afro with a big hole in the middle.

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  5. With all due respect to (Ron) Washington’s wonderfully glabrous cupola, I’m fairly certain Larry David previously acquired the syndication & trademark rights to “Great Moments in Baldness” with his skillful articulation of the bald man’s dilemma/pathos, “This is all well and good but I’m still bald.”

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