Hot Stove Headlines, Misinterpreted

The headline that was literally interpreted.

As Zach Links of MLB Trade Rumors reported yesterday — relaying info from’s Jerry Crasnick — agent Scott Boras has attempted to engage the New York Mets on his clients Kendrys Morales and Stephen Drew.

What that statement probably doesn’t mean, but what I have decided to believe is true — because without constant flight of fancy such as this I would become overwhelmed by the number and magnitude of my own failures — is that Boras attempted to become engaged to be married to the Mets while on top of Morales and Drew.

And so it is:

Boras Trying to Engage Mets
It will all be over soon, Stephen.

This has been a Hot Stove Headline, misinterpreted.

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6 Responses to “Hot Stove Headlines, Misinterpreted”

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  1. Larry says:

    From today’s ESPN MLB headline: “O’s Patton tests positive”

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  2. ettin says:

    Simply Amazin’!

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  3. Helladecimal says:

    oh lord

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  4. stockhfcrx says:

    This is meant to *distract* you from your failures?

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  5. RJ3 says:

    Oh man, I wish I had seen this when it was posted. I could have been happy for days!

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