Nickname Seeks Player: Vote on “Gomez’s Hamburger”
Names have been placed into nomination, Gomezes have been eaten, and hamburgers have been sexed. Thus, the time for voting is nigh.
The question before you, the obsequious, poo-slathered citizen steeped in delusions of enfranchisement, is this: which player should be nicknamed “Gomez’s Hamburger”? To the Diebold voting machine/Sybian!
Thank you for exercising the franchise, such as it is.
Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.
11
Seriously: Malcolm Clapsaddle.
But can he play?
Boooooooooooof.
Boof should be disqualified because Boof is already a nickname. His birth name, “John Paul Bonser”, is not nearly cool enough for the ballot.
He legally changed it to Boof, ergo he is re-nicknameable.
You misspelled Albuquerque.
Not that it matters because every discerning voter will choose Mark Hamburger.
Al’s last name is not spelled the same as the New Mexico city, Dayn has it spelled correctly in the poll.
Oops!
I guess I’ll just sit here and say “hamburgerschwindenhammer” to myself for awhile.
Vote for Delmon! He is more hamburgerlike than Mark Hamburger himself.
Malcolm Clapsaddle will ask for a recount if he loses
I was disappointed in the NotGraphs community when “Liván Hernández” was awarded to Liván Hernández. Let’s not make the same mistake again. I like to thing we’re a little more creative (or at least drugged up) than that.