Introducing the New SCOUT Leaderboard

Synd

This is Noah Syndergaard, Mets pitching prospect. Would you like to see his statistics, perhaps cycled through Carson Cistulli’s famed SCOUT formula? Well, go ahead type in “SCOUT Leaderboard” into the Fangraphs search bar. I’ll wait.

I have created a transcript of your failed endeavours below.

Fangraphs search engine (FSE): “You want ‘SCOUT Leaderboard,’ you say?”

You: “Yes. I want to see if Carson has written anything about SCOUT lately.”

FSE: “Ah yes, here it is.”

You: “…”

FSE: “Can I help you within anything else? Perhaps a Johan Santa page?”

You: “This is Noah Syndergaard.”

FSE: “Yes, the SCOUT Leaderboard.”

You: “No, you gave me Noah Syndergaard’s statistics. I wanted blog articles about the SCOUT Leaderboard.”

FSE: “How about Mike Trout? The kids can’t get enough of him these days.”

You: “Okay, maybe you could look for ‘SCOUT Leaderboards.’ You know, with an S.”

FSE: “HAHAHA! What the hell are you even saying? I can’t even understand what you just said. Hahaha! I dunno, I mean, here’s some old Daily Notes articles with SCOUT Leaderboards in them, but I don’t think that’s what you want. But, whatever.”

You: “Yeah. Thanks, I guess.” … “Oh, bummer, I think Carson stopped posting these.”




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Bradley writes for FanGraphs and The Hardball Times. Follow him on Twitter @BradleyWoodrum.


8 Responses to “Introducing the New SCOUT Leaderboard”

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  1. Well-Beered Englishman says:

    Oh my god, these have been gone so long I forgot what they were.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  2. dang says:

    “Can I help you within anything else? Perhaps a Johan Santa page?”

    lmao

    +10 Vote -1 Vote +1

  3. Kris says:

    If you’re looking for Cistulli articles, simply search for “Hitler: Time Travelling Cistulli?”

    It gives you a list of articles, as well as a link to Vinny Castilla. Casilla’s fWAR is 19.4 — or, if we’re using rounding rules 19.35, 19.36, 19.37, 19.38, 19.39, 19.40, 19.41, 19.42, 19.43, 19.44.

    A little too coincidental for me. In 1935, Germany’s flag is changed to the swastika and the Nuremberg laws are enacted. Whereas 1944 saw Operation Overlord commencing with Operation Nepture. By 1945, Hitler was no longer.

    Think on that for a bit.

    +21 Vote -1 Vote +1

    • DavidKB says:

      NotGraphs is the only place on the internet where reading the comments is as fun as reading the articles.

      +7 Vote -1 Vote +1

    • Not an expert says:

      I did exactly as you said, which led me to Castilla’s 1999 season where he hit 33 HRs, good for an Off of -20.8. Oh, how things have changed!

      Vote -1 Vote +1

  4. Paul G. says:

    Why do I sense the FSE is the Microsoft Office paperclip?

    “It looks like you are trying to be funny.

    Would you like help?

    – Get help trying to be funny.

    – Just be funny without any help.

    – You know what would be funny? Dropping an anvil on a talking paperclip. Can you help me with that?

    (checked) Don’t show me this tip again.”

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  5. MikeS says:

    I don’t want info on Johan Santa, but do you have anything on the wrong Jose Abreu?

    Vote -1 Vote +1

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