Jeff Samardzija Mnemonics

1. “Sam” as in Jeff’s brother’s first name. “Ard” as in the last three letters of “yard,” since he set an all-time record for reception yards playing football at Notre Dame. “Zija” as in the name of some weird “miracle tea” that the Internet says is a marketing scam and that one Amazon reviewer says gave her diarrhea.

2. “Samar” as in a province in the Philippines whose capital is Catbalogan City. “DZI” as in the three-letter code for Codazzi Airport in Colombia, so small there does not even appear to be a Cinnabon. “Ja” as in the unit of measurement of length in Korea equal to approximately 30.3 cm.

3. “SA” as in Sexaholics Anonymous. “Mardz” as in a woman in Macedonia renting out her apartment on Airbnb. (Just $46/night!) “IJA” as in the International Jugglers Association.

4. “Sama” as in the Society of American Mosaic Artists. “RD” as in Rainbow Dash, a character in the TV Show “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.” “Zij” as in the Islamic astronomical books. “A” as in America, where Samardzija was born.

5. “S” as in “starting pitcher.” “Amardzija” as in the last 9 letters of Jeff Samardzija’s name.

Now you will never forget how to spell Samardzija. Or maybe you will. Sorry.

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Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.

11 Responses to “Jeff Samardzija Mnemonics”

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  1. Mr. Observant, Amateur Dentist says:

    That’s some nasty gum recession Samardzija’s showing on his upper left central. Midl recession and discolouration on the left top incisor as well. This should have a watch for the near future.

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  2. Well-Beered Englishman says:

    Anyone here listen to the podcast Comedy Bang! Bang!? The recent episode featuring the mnemonic INTERDIMENSIONALFRYVAULTGRAB is one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard.

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  3. Rich Mahogany says:

    You must be great at Scrabble.

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  4. Craig Breslow says:


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  5. Wobatus says:

    Memo to self: if you ever need a place to crash in Skopje, Mardz.

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  6. Blockhead says:

    I don’t know how airbnb works, but I wonder if Mardz has access to how many hits her room gets. She must be pretty confused after today.

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  7. Jay29 says:

    I learned to spell it back in the Notre Dame days just by silently pronouncing it phonetically (can something be pronounced silently?) whenever I need to type it.


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  8. A jiz drama s, backwards.

    Now you will never (a) misspell his name again and (b) look at his name the same.

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