Josh Hamilton Strikezone Constellation: The Mangled Digit

Crooked Finger

It has recently come to the present author’s attention that, literally every single day in this country, either hundreds or maybe even slightly more hundreds than that of office workers leave their respective places of business without having been mildly amused by the internet. With a view towards addressing this state of affairs sans delay, the author has elected to revisit here a series begun earlier in the year in which mildly amusing* constellations are constructed from certain of Angels outfielder Josh Hamilton‘s single-game swing charts.

*But no more than that.

One finds, in this case, an entry from Hamilton’s August 14th game against the Yankees (box). In said contest, Hamilton appears to have offered at six pitches during the course of the game, precisely none of which was in the strike zone. The constellation which results bears more than a passing resemblance to a mangled finger or mangled other-sort-of-thing. In either case, reason dictates that the injured party should consult a physician, stat.

Credit to Texas Leaguers for the strikezone plot.

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10 Responses to “Josh Hamilton Strikezone Constellation: The Mangled Digit”

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  1. digit or dong says:

    gentleman’s sausage.

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  2. Lenard says:

    Crooked Shifter

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  3. ettin says:

    He’s got his you-know-what on the pulse of the game.

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  4. jcxy says:

    so cock, yes?

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  5. ElJosharino says:

    It could be a cucumber.

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  6. TheJosh says:

    PodrĂ­a ser pepino.

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  7. Alyosha says:

    That’s the ancient Egyptian hieroglyphic for 10000. Obviously.

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  8. John Holmes says:

    3 feet from tip to bottom. Has to be some kind of record.

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  9. GoodasGoldy says:

    It’s clearly Dikembe’s finger cautioning Josh not to go there.

    Heed the warning Josh, dammit your killing me!

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  10. Susan Murray says:

    Clearly he needs to make some adjustments, he’s easy to pick apart in a scouting session and that’s why pitchers have owned him this year.

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