Mets Trying To Raise Revenue Wherever They Can

I just got this e-mail from the Mets about upcoming promotions. (Yes, I’m on the mailing list.)

I understand that it’s hard to increase ticket prices when your team is not so good, and that there are a lot of empty seats at the stadium, and no one wants to eat the food anymore now that Ryne Sandberg’s intestines exploded from a Shake Shack burger…

But to charge for a post-game concert???

Yes, I know it’s just half a dollar, but it’s the principle of it.

At least the shirts on Friday are free.

But what’s next?

A dollar to watch the manager when the Orioles are in town?

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Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.

8 Responses to “Mets Trying To Raise Revenue Wherever They Can”

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  1. RunTeddyRun says:

    Oye. That facepalm left a hell of a bruise on my forehead.

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  2. John Elway says:

    I hear Sandberg did NOT get sick from that $4.95 Shake Shack burger.

    It was from the Nickelback he got after paying with a $5.

    Just neighing.

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  3. Brad Penny says:

    No comment.

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  4. Clock says:


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  5. Ambiguous Hat Day says:

    Is the event on Sunday celebrating fathers and celebrating kids’ caps?
    Must the dads also be 12 and under?

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    • Pinstripe Wizard says:

      Yes of course. It’s the Mets. You think they can afford to give out full sized hats? Less circumference of noggin’ on a dad 12 and under than a dad that’s over 12. Less circumference of noggin’ translates into less material, thus less money which the Mets don’t have to waste.

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