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More Possible Replacements for Curtis Granderson

Posted By David G. Temple On February 26, 2013 @ 6:02 pm In Real Talk | 7 Comments

One of the biggest stories of this very young preseason is that Yankees’ outfielder Curtis Granderson will be sidelined for a while with an arm injury. This has led many to speculate who will be his replacement. Opinions have been opined about free agents, trades, and internal candidates. Allow me to offer three options no one has mentioned yet.

johnfielderphoto

  1. Landscape Photographer John Fielder. Way back long ago, people use to take on surnames depending on their chosen profession. This is why we have names like Miller,  Blacksmith, and Methcook. This trend is less common today, but why don’t we try to resurrect it? I say put John Fielder in left field and see what he can do. Worst case scenario, he can Instagram some sweet pics from over there. I hear the lighting is quite good.

Jane_Fonda

  1. Actress Jane Fonda. Fonda doesn’t have what you may call a “stereotypical baseball body” due mostly to the presence of breasts and the fact it’s over 70 years old (well, most of it). But what she lacks in possession of an athletic vessel, she more than makes up for in tenacity, leadership, and desire. If the lady can be married to Ted Turner for 10 years, I’d trust her to hold her own among the Yankee faithful. Third base is more her natural position, but she has been described as “left of center.”ceedog
  2. Cee Angi’s Dog. Fellow baseball scribe Cee Angi owns a dog (but, really, it’s like the dogs own us, right!?) that teeters on the border of being too cute to live. On one hand, I want to grab it and squeeze it. On the other, I want to grab it and squeeze it so hard it’s head pops off. It’s really touch and go. The bottom line is this dog would be a terrible ballplayer because it’s little and stupid and it has too much length in its swing. But look at it. It’s only a month. Come on, let it play baseball for the Yankees. If you don’t you’ll hurt its little feelings. DO IT! YOU CAN’T RESIST!

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