Mustache Watch: Kevin Youkilis, American Constable

The reader will likely know that Kevin Youkilis was recently placed on — and has, even more recently, returned from — paternity leave by the Chicago White Sox. What our Investigative Reporting Investigation Team has learned in the meantime, however, is that Youkilis’ absence was not designed to facilitate his presence at the birth of his first human child. Rather, it allowed him time to sire, bear, and deliver the mustache (pictured above) favored by constables of all seven continents and probably space, too.




Print This Post

Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.


Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
Mike Bates
Member

Bee-autiful. That mustache would have filled Wyatt Earp so full of lead at the OK Corral, if it had only been alive at the time.

matt
Guest
matt

all the white sox are sporting stache’s to honor their bench coach kevin hickey that passed earlier this season

you should see chris sale’s attempt – 23 years in the making

matt
Guest
matt

all the white sox are sporting staches to honor their bench coach kevin hickey that passed earlier this season

you should see chris sale’s attempt – 23 years in the making

Smooth
Guest
Smooth

Bears!

sinsooooooochoooooo88
Guest
sinsooooooochoooooo88

lavarnway on the watch

wpDiscuz