My Actual Valentine to My Actual Wife

In the interest of both (a) not wanting to let a good thing slip away and (b) not making the same mistakes Billy Joel made, I utilized the most recent holiday to tell my wife all about how I love her.

Or, actually, better than that, I had both Rubby de la Rosa and Craig Counsell tell her for me.

(Click to embiggen, jerks.)

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Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

6 Responses to “My Actual Valentine to My Actual Wife”

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  1. Yirmiyahu says:

    Has she kicked you out yet?

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  2. John says:

    Was that valentine printed on a cocktail napkin from a classy joint, such as the Irish Pub on State Street or a seedy joint like Visions on East Wash?

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  3. Dave Barker says:

    Wow, way to put out minimal effort. Was the card accompanied by a coupon for 3 free back rubs?

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  4. Peter R says:

    Why is the black guy talking all racist? “…I heard” instead of “Hey, I heard you are a really great lady.” Might as well have spelled it “herd” and be done with it.

    Do it big or go home.

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