Nickname Seeks Player: Vote on “50 Free Quality Sales Leads”

The nomination process, which requires a credit card number for automatic renewal, is complete. But, lo, there is news!: The Iron Council of Patriots Speckled with the Blood of Quislings has ruled that, in this instance, an entire team is eligible for the nickname in question, which is “50 Free Quality Sales Leads.” So you are encouraged to vote your conscience, so long as your conscience is right-wise and informed by sanctioned holy texts.

So, land-owning Episcopalian citizens, you may now cast ballots on who — or what! — should forevermore be nicknamed “50 Free Quality Sales Leads” …

Thank you for exercising the franchise.

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11 Responses to “Nickname Seeks Player: Vote on “50 Free Quality Sales Leads””

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  1. dbake005 says:

    I refuse to vote for Brett Wallace until the nickname “chubby college girl who thinks she’s cute’s body” is available.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  2. Well-Beered Englishman says:

    1. Jeffrey Loria
    2. Hanley Ramirez
    3. Logan Morrison
    4. Ozzie Guillen
    5. Having an aquarium
    6. We are the Marlins / The Miami Darlins

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  3. bankerboy says:

    I believe there is an additional obvious candidate. Prior to last year, he sold his services and theoretical “stability” to a new team. Over the course of the year he crushed the dreams of a city, a team and thousands of roto dreams everywhere. He also has that “elevator doesn’t go to the top floor” look that implies he would call in to claim free leads from a radio spot.

    His name, is Adam Dunn.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

    • Well-Beered Englishman says:

      Hey now. Adam Dunn doesn’t look dumb. He looks like a big nice farm boy that you could have a great time with, but he doesn’t look dumb…just goofy.

      Vote -1 Vote +1

  4. kenshin kawakami says:

    Vicinte Padilla needs, nay, demands a nickname but this a’int it.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  5. Czechvarmander says:

    I’d almost believe that was a picture of Carson…but there are entirely too few holes in that scrawny internet pornography purveyor’s shirt.

    Status: Unresolved.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  6. deadhead says:

    I obviously wrote in Bud Selig. His background selling quality used automotives is the stuff of which legends are made! Plus, this particular nick name is culled from Bud’s opening spiel, which he is known to bark while grasping your elbow during a firm handshake… “50 free quality sales leads thrown in with the purchase of a new stadium down here in San Jose.”

    Vote -1 Vote +1

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