One Day, Joe Pettini Will Show Them All

One day, Joe Pettini will show them all …

I'll Not Abide This Much Longer

Joe Pettini’s far-off gaze — it smoulders at the today about him just as it aches for the tomorrow before him. He is, for miserable now, a Le Tigre wearer lost in a remorseless hierarchy of Those Who Don Privileged Izods. Whatever mastery the lunchroom table — that steering committee of knaves, where he is not welcome — holds over Joe Pettini, it is as fugitive as the pupa.

The ribs of Joe Pettini encase not only a mighty heart, but also a concrete intake facility — painted in mute, industrial gray, the color of Prussia’s lost battles. Inside that cell subsists Joe Pettini’s numbed will. It is disembodied save for two crispy fingers, and those fingers, each night, summon the hardihood to scrawl a prisoner’s tally of the crudest hours until July 10, 1980.

On that day, all will be shown because Joe Pettini will show them all.

So assail him for now, invertebrates of the homerooms and hallways, but know this: the hunches you mock are the very wounds from which Joe Petini’s thunderclap wings will grow. You shall know him by his talons.




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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.


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Brian
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Brian
3 years 7 months ago

Remember that time Joe Pettini was the interim manager for the Cardinals because TLR had shingles? That was awesome.

Antonio bananas
Guest
Antonio bananas
3 years 7 months ago

I thought LaRussa was stuck in one of his reliever decision making trees for a few months that time.

bowie
Member
bowie
3 years 7 months ago

This is why we need gun control.

Mike Magie
Guest
Mike Magie
3 years 7 months ago

Haiku Time

Oh Joe Pettini
How your golden locks doth shine
Your gaze says real man

Byrne
Guest
Byrne
3 years 7 months ago

you mean like a real man’s man?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgJ99R0TH-Y

reillocity
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reillocity
3 years 7 months ago

That’s Pettini doing his very underrated Scorsese impression on the card. Still beats Maddon’s by a mile.

Billy v from QV
Guest
Billy v from QV
3 years 7 months ago

Joe looks like Father Guido Sarducci.

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