Pedro Martinez Country Music Album

Because the waking life holds nothing for me, I took an afternoon nap recently. Within the gauzy bounds of that nap, I learned that Pedro Martinez, baseball merchant of the sublime, had recorded and released a country music album. I purchased and downloaded it but — in keeping with the general state of shit — I woke up before I could listen to it.

I was so struck by this dream that I hinted at it to the world …

This was at once a statement of fact, the first entry on a list of demands and — like all forms of communication — a distress signal. As badly as I wanted Pedro Martinez Country Music Album to exist, I might as well wish for an electric sandwich.

Things as they are, I am left with nothing but remnants in the foul-smelling penumbrae of my imagination …

Pedro Martinez Country Music Album

In Donald Barthelme’s “How I Write My Songs,” whomp-whomp is a refrain, and so the title of one track on Pedro Martinez Country Music Album will be “Whomp-Whomp,” which could be a thinly veiled song about coitus — suggestive yet necessary, like a bra. “Got Damn, Woman” will be another track, honky-tonkish in execution. “Funeral for a Mockingbird” is yet another, acoustic until Pedro himself drifts in with the pedal steel in the second verse. “Angina in Carolina” is his hymn to long-haul truckers. During production, Pedro used accomplished Nashville session players, I feel sure.

I know little else about Pedro Martinez Country Music Album. It visited me in a dream, is all.




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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.


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stockhfcrx
Member
Member
stockhfcrx
2 years 9 months ago

Is it an accident that your art suffers in the obscurity of EOB, or is the world just not ready for the unleashing of your literary fuck-stick? Or is it the jimmy beam?

August Burns Red
Guest
August Burns Red
2 years 9 months ago

Borrow the acoustic version of “Internal Cannon” (bonus track #13:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leveler_%28album%29

Mike Green
Guest
Mike Green
2 years 9 months ago

Dream Analysis 1:00-2:00. Boston Red Sox, hillbillies. Pedro Martinez, country music album.

That’ll be $500 please. Amber at the front will take cash or credit card.

The Return of Rambo Diaz
Guest
The Return of Rambo Diaz
2 years 9 months ago

This could be no worse than a Terry Bradshaw country music LP.

Is The Midget and the Truck Stop on this album, or was it only released as a single?

Dwayne Carter
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Dwayne Carter
2 years 9 months ago

i like your style (no homo).

Alexander Nevermind
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Alexander Nevermind
2 years 9 months ago

Wamp, wamp / what it do (what it do)

Micah Stupak
Member
2 years 9 months ago

Whatever the opposite of my-life-is-complete is, seeing Bleeding Cowboys on fangraphs is it.

KCDaveInLA
Guest
KCDaveInLA
2 years 9 months ago

This is where my next band name is coming from: KC Dave and the Electric Sandwich.

triple-A city
Guest
triple-A city
2 years 9 months ago

This album is entirely real. My favorite is track #8 featuring Grady Little in “Left It In Too Long,” a mournful reflection of young man’s transition into the responsibilities of adulthood.

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