Poll: Home Run Seeks Hashtag — Jon Singleton

jonbombjovi

In the current state of baseball, where tiny little NSA cameras are tracking every player’s move and GMs do deals exclusively via business sexts, a player must make sure they are well represented in the online community. Anybody who is anybody has an out-of-date webpage promoting their charity, an Instagram account for posting dark and blurry pictures of steaks, and a Twitter page that shares bullshit phrases falsely attributed to famous people. This is imperative. A player’s to-do list for the day includes calisthenics, a sensible meal, and stepping up their social media game to the fullest. Can’t stop, won’t stop.

This is the case for Jonathan Singleton. His MLB career is one day old, but he already has a major league home run under his belt. That’s one home run wasted without a signature home run hashtag. His teammate George Springer has the almost coital #SpringerDinger moniker to denote his home runs. It is time to create another.

The Astros fans/writers I commiserate with on Twitter have some ideas, but since at least 12% of NotGraphs readers are creative, I figured it would be a good idea to ask the filthy masses. Do your best. Make daddy proud.




Print This Post

David G. Temple is a systems analyst who writes for FanGraphs, NotGraphs and The Hardball Times. He hosts the award-eligible podcast Stealing Home. He has contributed to The Classical and The Platoon Advantage. Dayn Perry once called him a "Bible Made of Lasers." Follow him on Twitter @davidgtemple.

25 Responses to “Poll: Home Run Seeks Hashtag — Jon Singleton”

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
  1. Bryan says:

    #Quadrupleton

    +33 Vote -1 Vote +1

  2. Mike Green says:

    Nice rookie bat-flip. He’s years from his prime and has loads of potential. Some think that post-THC memory loss aids in flipping, but the subject has not been thoroughly studied.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

    • mario mendoza says:

      It’s true that brains get in the way of on-field performance. Sounds like Greinke and Lars Anderson should have partaken.

      Vote -1 Vote +1

  3. pags140 says:

    Singleton should generate a lot of work for the NotGraphs Crack Investigative Team.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  4. Adam says:

    Can’t stop, won’t stop! (Doing squats)

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  5. robertobeers says:

    #ABUNDANTDONG

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  6. Umpire Weekend says:

    #HighAndDeep

    +9 Vote -1 Vote +1

  7. That Guy Who Won't Let It Go says:

    #GRAVITYBOMB

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  8. GHOSTS!!! says:

    #LOLPHILLIES

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  9. Soup says:

    @DCameronFG

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  10. Jack Glasscock's Cup says:

    #BALLZNTHEBLEACHERS or #BOYZNTHESEATS

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  11. a eskpert says:

    #LONGHITBONGHIT

    +10 Vote -1 Vote +1

  12. Tatoo from Fantasy Island says:

    #LONGJON

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  13. Tatoo from the Island of Misfit Fantasies says:

    #TheAstrosAreAMajorLeagueTeam?

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  14. Dwayne Carter says:

    #hashtagged
    #THCyalater
    #dabomb
    #litup
    #pitcheddatshit,hitdatshit,smokeddatshit
    #nickelbagger
    #weedwhacked
    #inthemtreeslikecandycanes
    #smokedoutthepark
    #atticshot
    #washingtongrewit,ismokedit (if against the nationals)

    if he played centerfield in houston, they’d rename that thing cypress hill, cypress hill.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  15. Anonymous says:

    #HomeRun

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  16. Free Bryan LaHair says:

    #hash-tagged
    #-ed

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  17. Chris Perez says:

    #ImOffTheHook

    Vote -1 Vote +1

  18. JimmyD says:

    Home run seeks hash tag. Singleton seeks hash.

    Vote -1 Vote +1

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Current day month ye@r *