Poll: Which TMNT is Delmon Young?
The purveyors of the Productive Outs podcast posed this interesting morsel of knowledge during last night’s World Series game:
Delmon Young is the closest we’ll ever get to a real life Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Enjoy it while you can, folks.
— Productive Outs (@ProductiveOuts) October 26, 2012
This led me to wonder. If Delmon Young is indeed a Teen-aged Mutant Ninja Turtle, which one would he be? By my count, we have four options. Observe:
Leonardo – he leads.
Donatello – does machines.
Raphael – cool, but rude.
Michelangelo – party dude.
I turn to you, fair NotGraphs readers, to answer this burning and not-at-all unimportant question.
David G Temple is a writer, radio host, gentleman, homeowner, tuba player, and a credit to his race. He was a B+ student while attending the University of Minnesota School of Journalism. You can follow him on Twitter @templedavid.
He hosts the radio show Stealing Home.
It’s Delmontell…..DONATELLO and it’s not even remotely close. I’ve been saying this since the Twins had him early on.
This is the best thing that’s ever been on this site. But the answer couldn’t be more obvious. Only one Ninja Turtle would ever throw a bat at an umpire, and it’s Raphael. And, like Young, Raphael would redeem himself by coming up huge when his team needed him (ALCS MVP).
I have to say Raphael. Why, you may ask? Because in the arcade game from ages ago, Raphael was the worst. No range at all.
“Raphael – cool, but rude.”
I’m REALLY hoping this was a workaholics reference…
Watch and learn, young friend. Pay attention especially starting at the 35-second mark.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDQzALOH9iU
I don’t know how I couldn’t remember that part. Better go dig up my VHS tapes…
Crap, next no one’s going to know anything about the couple of guys who were up to no and started making trouble in my neighborhood.
How did your mom react?
To my recollection, she became afraid, and suggested a move to a more affluent location.
Whichever turtle is worthless during the first 99% of the battle, but then makes a lucky mistake and kills the bad guy in the end.
Michaelangelo in a nutshell
Sometimes I think Sal Paradise was right…
Delmontello.
I loved playing the TMNT game and Donatello had the lamest moves compared to the others. He seemed just one dimensional thanks to clubbing people with his stick.
“Delmon Young is rude.”
-Abraham Mohomed, a falafel-cart worker who witnessed the mayhem.
All the turtles have redeeming qualities that do not overlap with the qualities that Delmon Young possesses. That being said, Michaelangelo was the most useless at his job of being a ninja, so…
Which Turtle is anti semitic again?
Casey Jones
April O’Neill
If you would pay attention to the lyrics, the answer is obvious:
Jim Leyland taught them to be ninja teens;
Verlander leads, Miggy Cab is a machine.
Delmon Young is cool but rude (gimme a break);
And Prince Fielder, is a party dude! A-HOY!