Poll: Who Is the MLB Krampus?
Is the world ready for Bud Krampus?
Thanks to everyone for your nominations for the MLB Krampus. There were a lot of them — too many to include in a single poll, in fact. So, I pared away some potential nominees that I didn’t see fitting into the Krampus way of life. Sorry to disappoint anyone.
There were some nominees that I expected (Selig, Cobb), some that were frightening surprises (Joe West), and some dark horses that I was hoping someone would nominate (Marge Schott).
I hope you’ll all vote, and vote carefully. Remember, the crowning of the Krampus is a serious matter: he determines how your children taste when they are eaten by other children.
I’ve included photos of all of the nominees, for your viewing pleasure horror.
Hire Robert J. Baumann to make hilarious jokes about genitals for any occasion, or just follow him on Twitter.
Still Milton Bradley.
biased lead image at the top!
The correct answer is Milton Bradley. I voted for Joe Buck, but Krampus will always be Milton Bradley in our terrified, trembling hearts.
Let’s do this, Marge!
The only reason not to vote for Marge Schott is if you don’t know who Marge Schott is.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1008139/index.htm
Wow. Just wow. I had no idea who she was until this article, and I’m floored.
As for Adolf Hitler, she takes a compassionate view. “He was O.K. at the beginning,” she says. “He rebuilt all the roads, honey. You know that, right? He just went too far.”
Krampusing all over the place.
“He was ok in the beginning . . .” Does that mean in the beginning he wasn’t stricken with overwhelming hate for all non-aryan, non-heterosexual people? Because as soon as those feelings started he went too far.
Written by Rick Reilly!!
Wow! I read the entire thing earlier and didn’t even notice that! That’s almost as mind blowing at the content of the feature.
he was good once.
our resident Navi Yirmiyahu got it right.
Tell ‘em Large Marge sent you!!!!
Good god that’s an amazing lineup. And the pictures are genius.
I could totally see Jeffrey Loria being it, but Ty Cobb is too tempting. And Marge Schott eats many babies.
Will think this over.
Whenever I think of Marge Schott, all I can picture is her dog lapping mayo out of a bowl. Hurl.
You are all being swayed by the picture of LaRussa with a puppy and a kitten. What you don’t know is that is his breakfast and lunch. Every day. For dinner he eats your hopes and dreams.
Marge Schott ate Tony LaRussa sometime in the early 90s… you have only been witnessing his cyborg, a bullpen minipulating doppleganger.
All rong.
George Mitchell.
Did you mean Kevin Mitchell? He ripped the head off his girlfriend’s cat.