Probably Serious Disease: Carlos Baerga Fever

Do not wonder, reader, whether I have modified a dispatch from the official Twitter feed of the Cleveland baseball Indians for my own, nefarious purposes. Wonder instead how many of your friends and family will die tragically from Carlos Baerga Fever, which is probably a really serious and actual thing.

According the Center for Disease Control, any of the following might be symptoms of Carlos Baerga Fever:

• Beautiful black mustache.
• Early decline.
• This is you:




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Choo
Member
3 years 11 months ago

I had Carlos Baerga Fever. It comes on strong but doesn’t last long. However, since having CB, every time I encounter a left-handed person I fall flat on my face. Literally. I didn’t have that problem before.

Dr. Feelgood
Guest
Dr. Feelgood
3 years 11 months ago

Thankfully, I caught Carlos Baerga Fever as a child, so I’m immune.

dp
Guest
dp
3 years 11 months ago

An often-missed symptom is inexplicable swelling of the buttocks and abdominal area, most especially found in sufferers over the age of 27. Even after the fever has run its course, patients often find that the swelling fails to subside for months, even years, without aggressive treatment.

deadhead
Member
deadhead
3 years 11 months ago

It looks as if fine taste in interior decorating may be a symptom also.

yosoyfiesta
Member
yosoyfiesta
3 years 11 months ago

Huh, isn’t he outside, at 44, remembering days gone by?

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