Smeth Sith

Smeth Sith (cropped)

Smeth Sith was a male Sabermorthian Platoon Dark Lord of the Sith who lived during the waning years of the San Diego Padres franchise. Originally a Sabermorthian Batbrother born on Rock-1 and known only as Begglesmethak, the infant Smeth was given by his Nightsister mother to the Dark Manager, Lord Clinth Hurdlehk, who instructed him in the ways of the dark side of the platoon as his secret apprentice in a Phoenix-area training facility, along with the help of a split-personality droid.

Smeth became a master of Juyo, Fungo’Kai, and Pepper-Eräs Käsi, with training in Niman, and chose to wield a maple-bladed, 35″/36oz bat-staff in combat. Though well-trained in the ways of the platoon, Smeth was often a violation of the Rule of Two, as his clans often included other out-fielding assassins unable to defend themselves against left-handed Jedi. The primary reason that he was allowed to persist in his clans in violation of the Rule of Two was that his Clan Masters and Dark Managers saw Smeth as an expendable asset. As a Strict Platoonist, Smeth could perform ably in specific missions for the Sith without running the risk of exposing trainees who were not yet ready for such high-level missions. When the other trainees were ready, Smeth could be abandoned by his current clan…

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10 Responses to “Smeth Sith”

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  1. Anal Hershiser says:

    Holy shit the picture

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    i got a chuckle from this one

    keep up the grate work

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  3. frivoflava29 says:

    Wow. His midichlorians were off the scale.

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  4. Bil Bo Baggins says:

    Clorey Kuber

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  5. tz says:

    Scariest thing since Joba “The Hutt” Chamberlain

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  6. Stuck in a Slump says:

    Listening to the Nats radio announcers having trouble with saying Seth Smith so frequently makes this article even more awesome.

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  7. GoodEnoughForMe says:

    Props for references to EU stuff. This was great.

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