Our All-Ugly team continues, on to the position players (who, by the way, would lose in an ugly battle with the pitchers and coaches). (What’s up with that?) (Any pitchers out there want to stand up for their kind?)
And lest any of you agree with my wife that this is all in poor taste, let me remind you that I a) included myself on the team and b) recognize that all of these men are real-life humans with real feelings and that this is all in good fun. Even Chase Utley has his bad days and all that.
Without further caveats, our All-Ugly lineup:
Baserunning Coach — Willie McGee
It’s like the ugly weighs so heavy on his conscience (or face) that he can barely keep his eyes open.
Catcher — Mike Napoli
Maybe it’s just the (dirty) particulars of this picture?
First Baseman — Placido Polanco
Is it the eyes that make the head look big? No. No. It’s the head that makes the head look big.
Second Baseman — Jamey Carroll
This is your typical Jamey Carroll picture. Also: frightening.
Shortstop — Jhonny Peralta
I think, if this was the first time you ever saw Jhonny Peralta, you would think Jhonny Peralta was much bigger than Jhonny Peralta is.
Third Baseman — Jorge Cantu
This is not just about acne, I promise.
Outfield — Jay Gibbons
Almost perfectly imperfect.