The Charlie Blackmon Omnibus

Charlie Blackmon in Front of Angry, Red Bill Cosby (i.e. Art)

At certain points in the not very distant past, the present author has utilized his editorial privileges to the end of celebrating both the je ne sais quoi and also just the regular quoi of Colorado outfielder Charlie Blackmon.

To mark Blackmon’s notable 6-for-6 performance on Saturday (box) — and also to exploit that achievement to the end of driving more internet traffic — I’ve assembled links to all the pieces concerning Blackmon that have appeared at this prestigious internet weblog.

Below are the works in question, presented in chronological order. Note that dates have been presented in classic European fashion (dd/mm/yy) for Maximum Sophistication.

Turn on Your Heartlight: Rockies to Promote Blackmon (06/06/11)
In which Neil Diamond’s opus is used as directed.

Charlie Blackmon Info: Blackmon to Start Tuesday (07/06/11)
In which the author explores the outer limits of his photo-editing capacities.

Charlie Blackmon in Front of Things (08/06/11)
In which the author reclaims art for the masses, to predictably disappointing ends.

Charlie Blackmon Writing Exercises: Pronoun Shift (08/06/11)
In which the author infects a different website with his Enthusiasms.

Charlie Blackmon’s Averages Follow Fibonacci-Like Sequence (18/06/11)
In which the author infects that same different website with new Enthusiasms.

Charlie Blackmon Hits First Home Run, Is Handsome (02/07/11)
In which the author problematizes masculinity, perhaps.

Charlie Blackmon Breaks Foot, Author’s Heart (07/07/11)
In which the author chronicles the rending of his own heart.

Charlie Blackmon Has Beard, Twitter Account (17/08/11)
In which no fewer than two facts are presented.

Charlie Blackmon in a Tiger Shirt and Your Memories (01/11/11)
In which, not unlike a TS Eliot poem, the past and the present occur simultaneously.

Zen Koan with Charlie Blackmon’s Name in It (23/08/12)
In which one is confronted by a paradox.

Charlie Blackmon’s Dream, Interpreted via Science (13/12/12)
In which science does sex to pseudoscience, metaphorically.

Charlie Blackmon Info: Charlie Blackmon Homered Today (12/05/13)
In which mensch becomes momentarily ubermensch.

Print This Post

Carson Cistulli has just published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.

Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
2 years 3 months ago

Woot! Go Chuck!

Brad Johnson
2 years 3 months ago


Mr. Observant
Mr. Observant
2 years 3 months ago

Bill Cosby was a Red Communist? Well, I’ll be damned…Top notch reportage, here.

2 years 3 months ago

What about the leaderboard of Joy, or whatever it was called? I still remember when I was new to this site, and somehow mistook Carson as a serious baseball analyst, I allowed him to convince me that Blackmon was a worthwile prospect with a bright future.