The Cold Weather is Pete Kozma

weather map

Suffering is universal, of course. We all suffer, and we all find ways to distract ourselves from it as often as possible. What cold weather does is make us especially unable to distract ourselves from suffering. It dissects our optimism, laying us open, piece by piece, revealing the bits that composed our wintery cheer and freezing them solid. So we complain. We moan, we cry, we tweet, we Instagram snapshots of temperature gauges and the frost in our beards. We complain a lot, and it feels good. So, to help us broaden the number of ways we can express displeasure with our nation’s airmass, allow me to put this arctic vortex in baseball terms: It’s Pete Kozma. And he’s about to bat for your team.

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Zach is an egregious malcontent whose life goal is to literally become the London Tube. @itszachreynolds.

7 Responses to “The Cold Weather is Pete Kozma”

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  1. Leonard says:

    It may be Pete Kozma, but he is making a lot more money than you are.

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  2. Every Nats Fan says:

    This would be much better than Pete (F-ing) Kozma batting against my team.

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  3. tz says:

    Pete is correctly positioned in that scatterplot of wRC+.

    Love to see this feature with other players. Perhaps you can do Tony Pena Jr. over a map of northern Canada.

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  4. Arctic Vortex says:

    Really Zach? Pete Kozma? This is so unfair. I haven’t been this insulted since the Weather Channel compared me to Ike Davis.

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