The Spectrum of Spectacles: From Vance Worley to Kurt Russell

Here at NotGraphs, we have often tried to shine a light on how spectacles make the game of baseball better. How much better? Well, it’s hard to quantify. But I think it’s safe to say “lots.” They make baseball lots better.

But there is a spectrum of spectacles. On the one end are these monstrosities worn by Vance Worley, which understandably led to a 7.21 ERA and a 5.55 FIP for the Twins in 10 starts:

 Worley

 Now compare them to these spectacles worn by Kurt Russell during his three seasons as a minor league second baseman baseball in the Angels’ system from 1971-1973:

Russell

No, those glasses did not lead to big league success (although Russell did hit a respectable .292/.361/.365). But they did lead to this:

 Big-trouble-in-little-china-

And this:

 Thing

And this:

Tombstone_movie_poster

And, most importantly, to this.

 escape_new_york06

And aren’t we all better for it? A shame, in that last one, that his sight in that eye got so bad that he had to stop using it altogether.

Yes, that was a long walk for an eyepatch joke and Snake Plissken reference. But much like Snake himself, I don’t give a fuck about your long walks. What’s my point? Aside from the fact that Kurt Russell is awesome? Choose your eyewear carefully, my friends.




Print This Post

Mike Bates used to have a stupid pseudonym. Now he doesn't because people want to pay him to write about baseball on the Internet and he's really a sell out that way. He is also a Designated Columnist at SBNation, co-founder of The Platoon Advantage, and is an American Carpetbagger on Getting Blanked, the finest in Canadian baseball-type sites. His favorite word is paradigm. Follow him on Twitter here: http://www.twitter.com/commnman


2 Responses to “The Spectrum of Spectacles: From Vance Worley to Kurt Russell”

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
  1. MickO says:

    Snake Plisskin? I thought he was dead.

    +5 Vote -1 Vote +1

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Current ye@r *