Today in Decidedly Juvenile B-Ref Player Name Searches

Offered up with little introduction — and even less discretion — I present to you following decidedly juvenile Baseball-Reference player name searches …

John Cock

John Cock.

John Balls

John Balls.

Kevin Assman

Kevin Assman.

Tod Prick

Tod Prick.

Ralph Sack

Ralph Sack.

Larry Butt

Larry Butt.

This has been “Today in Decidedly Juvenile B-Ref Player Name Searches.”

You smell like poo and toots.




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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.


30 Responses to “Today in Decidedly Juvenile B-Ref Player Name Searches”

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  1. Kzuke says:

    Forgot Fukudome

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  2. triple_r says:

    Na na na boo boo, I’m better than you you, stick your head in do do.

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  3. Del B. Vista says:

    The BBref person responsible for following site search trends is in for an interesting next couple of hours.

    I found a Robert Clites.

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  4. The Kudzu Kid says:

    These folks have nothing on Rusty Kuntz.

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  5. Ben says:

    Who could forget Dick Pole?

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  6. Ray says:

    I think Pete LaCock could go head-to-head with most of these guys.

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  7. Clark D says:

    Pussy Tebeau
    Cum Posey (HOFer)

    Best one yet – when searching for “fuc”, one result is Billy Ripken.

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  8. Pussy Tebeau says:

    80085

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  9. Pirates Hurdles says:

    Had no idea that if you search for a curse word on BR it goes to a picture of a bar of soap and a mouth. Pretty clever.

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  10. Mr. Observant says:

    Johnny Dickshot – Player/Manager. Book it! I have to write, Dayn, this post shows a lot of spunk. I guess you like to share your spunk with the readers. We appreciate it greatly.

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  11. JayT says:

    When I was a juvenile my brothers and I would always call Rusty Greer “Gusty Rear”. Does that count?

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  12. Turbo Sloth says:

    Not quite as juvenile, but there is a player named Chick Manlove that I found accidentally on there, and that’s pretty great.

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  13. Choo says:

    Back in the 1980’s, athletic cups were often referred to as Dick Howsers.

    Also, Stubby Clapp, an unfortunate venereal disease with the unfortunate side effect of diminished girth.

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  14. James K. says:

    What about the various guys called Nig? Are we not touching that?

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  15. The Nemesis says:

    These people have nothing on former pro hockey player Harry Dick http://www.hockeydb.com/ihdb/stats/pdisplay.php?pid=13007

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  16. Double J says:

    Mike Sweeney.

    Great name. Sad Story but great article.
    THE GOOD TIMES, HARD LIFE, AND SHOCKING DEATH OF DICK TRICKLE
    http://www.sbnation.com/longform/2013/7/30/4567960/dick-trickle-suicide-nascar-profile

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  17. LookItUp says:

    This list would be sadly incomplete without a mention of the immortal John Wesley “Pebbly Jack” Glasscock.

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