Tony Reagins and Arte Moreno: Two Wild and Crazy Guys

Vernon Wells isn’t exactly my idea of typical “American foxes.”

In case you missed it over the weekend, the Angels acquired Vernon Wells from the Blue Jays in exchange for Mike Napoli and Juan Rivera. I have a feeling that the first line of negotiations went something like this.

ALEX ANTHOPOLOUS: Hey Tony, hey Arte. Sorry I’m late.

TONY REAGINS: No hassles, man. Hey, listen to Arte’s joke!

ARTE MORENO: (chuckling) Okay. How many astrosign medallions can you wear?!

ANTHOPOLOUS: I don’t know.

MORENO: Next time, try five of them!

So far, I have yet to see a reasonable explanation for why the Angels would make this trade. That is, until I saw this tweet: Angels GM Tony Reagins and owner Arte Moreno are just two wild and crazy guys, and there is no pair of baseball executives who cruise so successfully in tight slacks. In the words of Yortuk Festrunk, “Hosed? Count me in!”

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I’m only half-joking about this, but I wonder if there’s some in-house protocol to buy up all the black centerfielders in MLB.